nexttuesday

I cant be lazy anymore. It's just not an option. You might think "Well its good not to be lazy". Which is true, but its also very hard for me for three reasons. Not excuses, reasons. 1. I work a whole hell of a lot which yall know and it really wears me out. 2. My meds (especially the ones I take when I have an attack) make me tired to the point of being lethargic. and 3. I have low blood pressure and seem to have to get hyper to do anything. Thats hard to do since one of my meds lower my blood pressure even more.

But like I said, those aren't excuses simply because I'm trying. I don't have the luxury of convenience anymore when it comes to food. It's funny how we take that for granted. You may not think you are but I bet you are. If you ever get fast food or even stop at a restraunt and dont stop to appreciate the fact that you can order just bout anything on the menu you are. If you go grocery shopping and dont stop to think how nice it is that you can grab a bag of chips or a tray of cookies you are. Hell if something tastes bland and you throw a dash of salt in you are.

Everything I eat is now made from scratch. This is difficult for me and for my family. Most things dont taste as good anymore. I have to keep telling myself Im eating for health not enjoyment. Im hoping my new cookbooks will help with this.

Anyways, Im rambling because I dont want to get to the point of this thread. My doctor is not so sure I have Meniere's disease anymore. So today I am going in to see if I have cancer. How stupid is that right? And I thought I wasn't nervous about it but I realized I kind of am. Cuz it is possible. I mean its possible for anyone right? I'm sure Im fine....I just need an ear transplant thats all...

le sigh