nexttuesday

I've decided I cannot drink anymore. It is becoming a problem, so I am cutting myself off for a little while. I am struggling with some things right now and realized alcohol is not going to make it better or easier. Away it goes into the night.

I also feel like I have lost myself somewhere. Or maybe I never found myself after my husband threw me out. Im not really sure which. Either way I cannot deny it anymore. I need to face it head on and fix it. Otherwise I shall never know pure happiness.

To get me there I need to take care of myself I believe.

1. No more fucking fast food. It is so disgusting I just feel like such a pig when eating it.
2. Start working out again. Im not happy with how flabby Im getting, time to fix it.
3. Start practicing Yoga again. I used to do yoga every day and havent dont it once since the split.
4. Meditate. I absolutely need to do this to find myself again. im not sure why I ever stopped.

To get me to happiness there are some things I need to change that arent health related:

1. Work one job. I feel like death working two jobs all the time.
2. Get debt down to a manageable amount. Its gonna take me a while to pay off, it would just be nice if it wasnt sooooo much!
3. Find a new apartment. I hate coming home to this ghetto shit hole everyday, it depresses me.
4. Find friends that make me comfortable and force them to hang with me.
5. And I'd really like to start mosaicking again.

So thats my plan. I dont really have much confidence in myself about it, but hey I'll give it a try.