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nebula

Utah

SG Since 2008

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Happy Goodbye NY anniversary

Jun 30, 2023
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Ten years ago today I finished packing up my car, left New York, and never looked back. The road trip along the way and subsequent move to San Diego changed my life in ways I hoped for, and ways I never expected. A lot of people told me “No.” I’d had a recent heartbreak and a lot of weird trauma around the end of that relationship, they thought I was running away. They said I shouldn’t go alone. They said I’d regret it. I 100% believe that leaving NY saved my life. I learned to be alone. I learned to love the outdoors. I learned to make new friends. I learned how to love and trust deeper. Maybe most importantly: I learned that I was capable of doing hard things. More than that: I learned that I *enjoy* doing hard things. I gave a lot up. So many of my favorite people live far away. I’ve missed my nieces and little sister growing up, and I know my relationships with them are not what they might have been if I stayed closer. There are people who used to be integral to my life, who haven’t stayed in touch or who I dropped the ball on maintaining contact with. So many people that I miss. But there’s also a quality to the happiness I’ve felt since moving west that I never felt in NY. I can breathe out here. I’m a fan of big changes. I’m a fan of doing the things that scare you. I’m a fan of leaping off the ledge in moments when you feel like you’re going to fall. I’ve since made a lot of other big changes that people generally tell me I shouldn’t do. Every one of them has been pivotal to my life, and every one I look at I know that the decision to move across the country enabled me to follow through with the next big change. I’m really grateful to be where I am now (literally and figuratively), and feeling hopeful for the next ten years.

VIEW 16 of 16 COMMENTS
gentlemanghost:
This is an amazing blog post and a very inspiring reflection. It's funny, my big exodus in life was to NY, which became the setting for a similar set of challenges and accomplishments in my life. In your posts, you always seem so at home in the Western US, it's interesting and motivating to hear some of the back story of how you ended up out there (I had no idea you were a fellow NYer). I hope you continue to find as much fulfillment and adventure in the next decade as you have in the ten year since you left the East Coast!
Jul 8, 2023
nebula:
@gentlemanghost I feel very lucky to have a lot of friends and family in NY still - it's a great place to be able to visit more easily, but out West feels like home and NY never did for me. But I have plenty of friends who NY is definitely home for, and I'm glad to hear it's been good for you! I hope good things keep coming for you as well 🙂 thank you!
Jul 18, 2023

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