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Not sure who did it but thank you for the gift membership cause i missed this place but had t cut back on spending ya know .... thank you again...kiss
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Why is it that I am more sadened by the fact that I can't go to any of Mest's final tour than the fact that I won't be home for my nephews' 2nd b-day? Why do I want, and slightly need, a man-child that I know would be extremely bad for my mental state? Why do I get more apathetic every day? What will make...
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braddropout:
What you have just described, is probably how 99.9% of people actually feel. Basicly, life is just a long running series of feelings and emotions that you hide from everyone else, every single day. We all live a lie. It's just the way things are. You're only ever as happy as you want to be. Look around you. I know for a fact you've got way more than a hell of a lot of people. Weigh it up. Count your lucky stars. Fucking cheer up. Dats an order smile
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no one ever plans to be alone for this long.
no one thinks to themselves, i don't want to be loved again.
why do i embrace such lonely times like i've asked for them?
why does it not surprise me that no one has come into my
heart?
am i using him as an escape?
no one ever plans to be alone for this long.
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Exchanging gifts with people who 'get you' is the best thing ever... From the Lizes I got ...

-Billy 'action figure'
-A silver rosery
-A neon light in the shape of a tombstone
-A cool Jack Skellyton trash bag holder for my car
-Monkey walet
-Neon green and pink glitter makeup
-And a 2006 calender made at a photo place with pictures from 12 of...
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braddropout:
i would get you, mmmm, dunno. a book? you look like you read. a book on rock and roll excess maybe? just a guess.
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All of this getting ready to fly back to Cali is depressing me. I really don't like going back there. I have to smile at people I don't like, breathe air I'd rather not, make sure my scars don't show... BUT I get to see my sister, my nephew (who's almost 2 already!!), and the only friend who's ever stuck by my through it all...
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I miss being loved by someone.
braddropout:
Would finding you attractive be enough? Not quite the same as being loved, but better than nothin. Yup, you're cute. hope that makes you feel a bit better smile
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I guess I write really good secrets in here since I'm alone ... like, none of my friends are really my friends. They think they are but I know they're not.
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in the dark i can still feel your breathe,
down my neck and across my shoulders,
the heat making my skin seperate from my bones and turning me into a ghost of myself.

in the dark i can still feel your touch,
hand flat on my stomache creeping up to my throat,
the strength making my legs go numb and my fingers straighten and tremble....
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god damn i never update in here ... i guess if i knew i had people to talk to more i'd make an effort but as of now i just come here when i think maybe they'll be new pics i like ...
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...living's just a waste of death...

i don't really have anything important to say ... not like it really matters cause no one reads this page anyway lol, just felt like making an update on my sg ...

... nothing but music and movies going on lately, still job hunting but the mono is making it harder cause this time it just won't bed down...
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ok my little family ... you should all head out to the Social tomorrow night (Thur the 12th). Priapism is playing a show AT THE SOCIAL! How awesome is that ... anyway it's only $5, the doors are at 8ish and the boys go on at 11! Please please please go it would mean so much!
-me