naja_haje

I was just thinking about the fun I used to have with one of my old bandmates...

He had just returned to the states from a 6 yr stint in the army overseas. The first place we hit was dead except for two girls sitting at the bar...
*he returns from the bathroom and walks up to two girls sitting at the bar*
suddenly both girls start shrieking and screaming
"FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!"
"I'M GONNA KILL YOU YOU MOTHERFUCKER!"
he is laughing hysterically as one of the chicks takes her beer bottle and hurls it at him.
he ducks as the bottle whizzes past his head and shatters against the wall.
*I'm in total disbelief as to what is happening*
The girl that threw the bottle now picks up her chair at throws that also.
"YOU THINK THAT'S FUNNY MOTHERFUCKER?!"
At this point the bartender grabs the second chair she is about to throw out of her hands and swiftly kicks both ladies out of the bar.

so what had he done to warrant this reaction?

While in the bathroom he made the acquaintence of a cockroach so large it should have had tags and a leash. He picked up his new found friend and thought it would be a hoot to show it to the ladies at the bar... you know, a conversation piece. He walked up to the ladies and said
"Hey girls, I brought you a present!"
and plopped his buddy on the counter.

Do you know the fireworks that spin around real fast and make a buzzing/ hissing sound?
bzbzbzbzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzbbbbzbzbzbzbzbzbzbzzzzzzzz!!!
...that is what this roach did.... at which point all hell broke loose.

damn i miss that guy...