So it's kind of weird this year... I'm not seeing my family at all for Thanksgiving and it's the first year without my grandmother. At the same time I know this could be the last with my mother in law so it holds that significance. These last few years have reminded me that I am a grown up and have to deal with grown up issues. I still remember the last Thanksgiving with my step grandfather, followed by the first w/o him and the last with my step grandmother. Then there was the first w/o my step grandmother and the last with my grandmother and now here I am. The words don't really express the magnitude of alll of these experiences and it's at times like this that I realize how much my family means to me.
This year my family is celebrating five hours away at my aunt's house and while I'd love to go I really can't because of custody sharing and how it all falls into place this year. Between my son and my ex and my step son and my husband's ex we have all kinds of schedules to try to work around.
Losing my grandmother this year was hard... and seems to be getting harder... but my husband stood by me and made sure we spent as much time with her as I needed. He also supported me spending extra time with my grandfather and I've been lucky to have been able to see him around 3 times a month. We knew she would be going and we knew that my mother in law would be close behind her as they are the same age and they both had serious medical issues.
That is why I'm glad that we are going to see my mother in law this year. We will have all three kids there and they know that she's not doing well so we're all going to soak as much of her in as we can and make sure she knows we love her.
I used to think of Thanksgiving as a ridiculous holiday... on my dad's side we used to talk about how it was really nice that we shared corn and farming with the pilgrims only to be rewarded with blankets exposed to small pox and a government that considered natives to be little more than animals. But now I see... it's about family and love and appreciating this amazing thing called life.
This year my family is celebrating five hours away at my aunt's house and while I'd love to go I really can't because of custody sharing and how it all falls into place this year. Between my son and my ex and my step son and my husband's ex we have all kinds of schedules to try to work around.
Losing my grandmother this year was hard... and seems to be getting harder... but my husband stood by me and made sure we spent as much time with her as I needed. He also supported me spending extra time with my grandfather and I've been lucky to have been able to see him around 3 times a month. We knew she would be going and we knew that my mother in law would be close behind her as they are the same age and they both had serious medical issues.
That is why I'm glad that we are going to see my mother in law this year. We will have all three kids there and they know that she's not doing well so we're all going to soak as much of her in as we can and make sure she knows we love her.
I used to think of Thanksgiving as a ridiculous holiday... on my dad's side we used to talk about how it was really nice that we shared corn and farming with the pilgrims only to be rewarded with blankets exposed to small pox and a government that considered natives to be little more than animals. But now I see... it's about family and love and appreciating this amazing thing called life.
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I think I kind of understand how you are feelin'...I lost both of my parents now, and of course grandparents as well. This year was my second without my mother, and Thanksgiving fell one day before what would have been her 73 birthday...seems like when I have a quite moment I find myself thinking of her and missing them both at the holidays even though it's been 11 years since my dad passed away. Dealing with the deaths of our parents and grandparents is one of the passages into adulthood that is so concrete! Sometimes we can live in denial about some of the other events that signify the passage into adulthood, but this one can not be denied.
I am sorry to hear about your losses...I hope you are able to enjoy the time that you have left with your family that remains, and of course with your husband as well. He sounds like an amazing guy!