mrdaft

Requiem for myself

Never let it be said that I did not try to climb every mountain. Never let it be said that I did not look adversity in the face and laugh. I looked upon every challenge in life as not that, but more of a learning experience. A journey through life can only be measured in the entrails of what is left behind. One does not leave monetary means behind, nor does one leave personal possessions behind, for those can be squandered or destroyed. Let my legacy be not anything you can hold or ever fully put into words. I do not think that the children of my childrens children will remember me, but let me instil some life into them with this. Let my legacy be, that which grows inside you, the little things that I have touched your life with. Let the soft whispers I have said, be the loudest things you remember, and let the harshest things I spoke be like silk and slide off your souls. I am not an angel; I am not a devil either. I was just a man trying to make his way in a world often filled with such cold and unsympathetic thoughts. I just wanted to be a beacon for those who forget that there are nice people out there. I may have annoyed, I may have made mad many a man. In the end, I did it all out of caring for the person. Anything truly disruptive I said was out of love. Anything said out of love was said because I cherish you all. Let this be my legacy that everyone here remembers that love is the grease that turns the gears of human compassion. I never gave up on anyone. People may have given up on me, but this is not the case with anyone I ever cared for. You all helped make me the person I turned into. For that I give thanks. There is no greater gift anyone could have given me. you all helped give birth to the man I turned into. I can only hope that I helped give birth to the person that you have turned into. I am but a speck in the fabric of time, a stone thrown into the ocean, may my ripple have an everlasting effect, cascading across other ripples and turning the tsunamis of life into nothingness, into calm waves. I may not have known where I was going, but I did know how to help people to go where they were going. A beacon, when you needed to rest your feet, a beacon that could be counted on most times. I leave this world today, knowing that the people sitting here have seen part of the true me. If they did not then they did not spend the time to know me, to see beyond the goofy faade I carried with me. The inner me is so much more than that person. I was brave when I needed to be, and I was chivalrous when I needed to be. I never backed down, and I gave up what was necessary to make others in my life better. To the people that know me, they know that I would give up the shirt off my back just to make sure they were warm. I never forgot anyone, even though I can imagine people thought I did. Out of sight did not mean out of mind. I always looked in on your lives and made sure you were safe. I let you make mistakes, to help you grow. You let me make mistakes to let me grow. Thus is the yin and yang of life. I always tried to bring order to the chaos you called life, while I thrived in the chaos brought into my order. One cannot exist without the other. To the people here, I give you a crystal shard; it represents the shards of my soul, my inner heart. It is still the vessel to which you can cry, tell the dreariness of life to, the one you can yell at. It is the vessel that lets you know I am still here and in love with you. For the love you have given me, I thank you. Alas, with bated breaths I cannot say more to you, it is time for you to take the rest of your journeys without me. There is no more bridges I can help you cross, no more days where I can be the rock you rest upon. I now lay me down to sleep, the eternal dream. The other side of the coin is now here for me.