mrcrisp

the way i see it, when i ship in march, they'll shave my head. i used to go through this weekly ritual where i'd cut my own hair. as short and uneven as it was, i'd just saved myself $15 dollars and it still looked good. now, though, i think i'll let it grow out until the great armed forces unification shears shave my head once and for all. the plan seemed flawless, bullet proof, logical. that is, until this morning, when i was rushed from bed to breakfast with the family. i sallied forth, the beast perched upon my head unnoticed. honestly, i doubt the heat helped much, either.

imagine my abject horror when i realized said beasty's presence.

i also ran over a squirrel today. as i moved along, i snuck a glance at my rearview mirror, the squirrel, disabled, waving its tail as one would a fist. at breakfast, my father told stories of squirrel dumplings and soup, the staples of his tennesseean childhoos diet. i offered to scrape the decaying bugger off the road if he was eager to pick up those old dietary habits. instead, he said it would be faster to just eat my hair.

i need to get off my ass tomorrow and call my recruiter. honestly, though, i'm not entirely excited about having that hulk of a man come over for lunch or something to explain what exactly i'll be doing in the navy for the next 6 years. it's not that i regret my decision to enlist, but the specifics of my enlistment are somewhat...unorthodox by my standards. for those who don't know what the navy nuke program is, this link is somewhat helpful. somewhat. barely. basically, this is what i have to look forward to: 2 years of training in mathematics, thermodynamics, nuclear physics, trigonometry, etc. in highschool, i took one math class. i got a "c." in college, i took the same math class 3 times, failing all 3 times, but that wasn't entirely because i was unfamiliar with the subject, but mostly because i have a strong distaste for school. apparently, because of my asvab and qualifying test scores, i was good enough to join this program. so yeah, all that stuff, plus the fact that i'll be performing routine maintainance on a nuclear reactor, plus the idea that this is the highest entry level position in the navy, plus the way all the other recruits glared at me, this is a lot of pressure. so no surprise that i'm not exactly looking forward to having a get-together with my recruiter where my family will undoubtedly ask a plethora of questions regarding the program. imagine what the fear is doing to my hair.