My baby Varla Jean loves me.
We are best friends. She loves to spoon with me (even though she's pretty bad at it, and ends up sleeping on top of my legs so I can't move) She doesn't cheat on me and find other moms. She is always happy to see me. And she never makes me mad (even when she pees where she's not supposed to)
I'm not sure if you guys knew this, but I was actually a Siamese twin. We had the seperation surgery though, and my twin lives in Philadelphia now.
I want a fucking BBC hoodie but the only ones I can find are XXXXXL or $200+. Fuck that. I should have bought one in Chinatown last month.
Do you guys believe in fortune cookies? Seriously, I always end up getting super relevant/prophetic fortune cookies.
I just realized what a ridiculous sounding question that was. Ha!
I'm fucking bananas!
I LOVE CHIPOTLE!!!
BURRITOS!!!!
We are best friends. She loves to spoon with me (even though she's pretty bad at it, and ends up sleeping on top of my legs so I can't move) She doesn't cheat on me and find other moms. She is always happy to see me. And she never makes me mad (even when she pees where she's not supposed to)
I'm not sure if you guys knew this, but I was actually a Siamese twin. We had the seperation surgery though, and my twin lives in Philadelphia now.
I want a fucking BBC hoodie but the only ones I can find are XXXXXL or $200+. Fuck that. I should have bought one in Chinatown last month.
Do you guys believe in fortune cookies? Seriously, I always end up getting super relevant/prophetic fortune cookies.
I just realized what a ridiculous sounding question that was. Ha!
I'm fucking bananas!
I LOVE CHIPOTLE!!!
BURRITOS!!!!
VIEW 25 of 25 COMMENTS
Are you sure that you and Britney Spears aren't twins? Judging from your fingernails you are. We should get manicures together soon. You know, now that I'm allowed.
Ray has a microchip. I don't think I'll be keeping him much longer. He's gonna have to go back to his real mom and dad.