monirose

aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

why do i feel like im in some kind of constant state of misery....i should be happy....i am doing well..my family is well..my friends are welll...... then i get soooo mad that i feel this way that i just want to smack myself..its retarded..

I worry that im turning into my mother!!!!! always looking for a reason...even if there isnt one..so then creating one...

that makes me soo mad because i see her flaws in me....the last person i want to be is her...

THATS IT!!! I QUIT!! tired of whining and complaining..how ridiculous is that...im a grown adult complaining..i should just be happy that im here...why can the silly things make me so happy.....but yet my accomplishments make me soo sad...i always have that feeling i could be doing more...not doing enough..so scared to get stuck in a rut..and soo trying not to be her..that im im doing it anyway

i just wish i could start over...

sorry just needed to ramble.....