missprivate

I don't even know what I am doing with my life right now. I finished two of my three finals today. One was in photography. I had my last critique in there and you know what? I was disappointed. Sometimes I wonder if photography is really what I am good at. None of my things ever seem to be breathtaking like I want them to be. Perhaps there really isn't a creative bone in my body. I have no idea what I want to do with my degree. I don't know where I want to work. I thought I could just make art for arts sake but if I do that then I should be getting a degree in something else and just doing photography as a hobby. But I'm not good at anything else. Do you see why this shit is confusing me?

I just need to get home and think. Three days left of this quarter.

Also, did I mention that there is this guy? He's really great and I like him but what does that even mean? After Danny I feel a little bumfuzzled about feelings. I want someone to come sweep me off my feet. I feel like maybe I'm not meant for relationships. That's fucking sad.

I need to just focus all of my attention on working and being a better artist.

On a positive note: Florida in five days! I'm so stoked about going home and then going to my aunt's beach house. I'm just going to sit on the beach, drink, and smoke.

Oh my life.