mindless

making out in public.

to answer you question about being picked on: yes. i grew up in a very conservative and restrictive middle class black family. some of my earliest memories are of fighting with my tyrannical dictator of a grandmother about who i was and who she said i was and going to be. i've always felt that i was different. i grew up listening to hard/dark rock and punk music with my uncle & we used to have to sneak off to his attic bedroom to listen to them so she wouldn't overhear us. everyone else in my family is still to this day scared to death of her disapproval.

my nickname for my whole family was: white sheep. and then when i grew up and went to public schools i was always being called a traitor to my race and being accused of acting white. it only got worse when i realized that i was attracted mostly to white punk rock skater guys. then it was always the teasing and taunts of: "what? aren't the brothers good enough for you?" or they'd call me an uppity-nigger saying that i was trying to be white. i've always had to fight to be who i am and now that i'm older i realize that i like who i fought for. and i'm not about to change it no matter how old i get.

sorry i'm ranting. that's it. i say fuck 'em if they can't handle who you are.
xxx
alisa