micajah

Ok....The suicide comment may have been a bit much. I was just saying i could understand. No way in fuckin hell I would do it.

Anyways.....The whole situation is still racking my brain. But, I think it will soon sink. I had this overwhelming feeling that I should completely give up on love. My instincts tell me that it will never happen with the girl I've been talking about. And even if it did, I don't think her feelings would be as strong as mine.

Whats killing me now is that I'm afraid I will push away every woman who tries to get close to me. Intimitely and Romantically I mean. Well.....I already do that. I just think it will double. More than likely it will. Also....I have a feeling I'm going to be an asshole to this girl now. I can't help it. Its a self defense mechanism. Aaaargh...but how childish is that.

I need a week or two fling with a cute girl who loves to get drunk and fuck.