i am jack's overwhelming sense of academic guilt.
why oh why do i procrastinate so much?
i'm interested in what i'm doing, really i am. i want to get work done. but i waste time. and more time. and more time. and i do nothing. and i continually kick myself for it.
i sat in my office for almost four hours tonight.
i edited two...
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why oh why do i procrastinate so much?
i'm interested in what i'm doing, really i am. i want to get work done. but i waste time. and more time. and more time. and i do nothing. and i continually kick myself for it.
i sat in my office for almost four hours tonight.
i edited two...
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
i'm talking with people in my OWN house on aim. it's fun, and it makes me talk kind of funny, so if i sound strange-like please excuse.
i made up a story about a spelunker that likes to wear women's underwear and a construction hat with a light on the front. he found a zebra in his harpsichord one day so he made a pair...
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i made up a story about a spelunker that likes to wear women's underwear and a construction hat with a light on the front. he found a zebra in his harpsichord one day so he made a pair...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
number6:
You look like Cameron Diaz....only really better looking !!
Please include a butt shot in your set !!
Thanks
A future fan !!!
Please include a butt shot in your set !!
Thanks
A future fan !!!
aquafantasy:
spelunking in women's underwear.... they should make that an olympic sport
ok, better now.. printed my thesis and got some decent work done. still have a lot more to do tonight, but that's ok.. i've worked for three hours so i can take a break. and my nap kicked in.. i'd just woken up and only wanted to go back to sleep for my last entry. meh.
unfortuantely, though, i don't have much to say. my...
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unfortuantely, though, i don't have much to say. my...
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VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
germany:
if you postpone your wedding to long...you might just fall in love with me...... well at least i tried
happosai:
wow....your b-day is the same as mine....so happy b-day...
(a little earlier but i won't remember in a hour)
(a little earlier but i won't remember in a hour)
i'm so tired..
and worried..
i just want it all to be over...
and worried..
i just want it all to be over...
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
lackadaisiac:
Sounds like someone is worried about the end of this semester.
leningrad:
being tired amplifies worry. sleep is the mind numbing releaser of stress.
in my office at school, and supposedly working on my thesis. oh well, at least i did a couple of hours - wrote a page and modified a lot of stuff.. and i'll do more when i get home, but it's more important for me to study for my german test, i think. *sigh* my thesis is such a behemoth right now. and i know...
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VIEW 12 of 12 COMMENTS
bogiebeau:
Roses are red
violets are blue
your eyes are sweet
marry me
*i love to rhyme*
violets are blue
your eyes are sweet
marry me
*i love to rhyme*
apoplexy:
First advice- turn in as is. Never proof-read your own stuff. Bad bad.
Second - become a vegetarian just so you'll appreciate being an omnivore.
Third - It's always summer in the US Minor Outlaying Islands. It's also a state of mind.
Fourth - Trees are awesome.
Fifth - Never lose sight of your goal (cheesy I know)
-did you know Mei means beautiful in Chinese?
Second - become a vegetarian just so you'll appreciate being an omnivore.
Third - It's always summer in the US Minor Outlaying Islands. It's also a state of mind.
Fourth - Trees are awesome.
Fifth - Never lose sight of your goal (cheesy I know)
-did you know Mei means beautiful in Chinese?
ach. hung the fuck over. and i have to go visit my parents in two hours... i better be feeling tiptop by then! i hate hangovers. especially because my forearms and hands always start hurting a lot.. i don't even get all that headachy, but other stuff hurts a whole lot. i took some naproxen and drank a bunch of water and am in the...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
satori1616:
Wow, you are straight up beautiful!! Just being honest, no hidden agenda or disrespect to your fiancee.
Cheers!
Cheers!
al:
Hmm... maybe I can pick you out from your hair!
I was hanged-over on Saturday. Mostly just an achey body. Sorry your hands hurted! That sucks.
I was hanged-over on Saturday. Mostly just an achey body. Sorry your hands hurted! That sucks.
the sun was out today. really out, not just peeking. i sat outside in boxer shorts and a too-big t-shirt. knees together, feet pigeon-toed.. my favorite way to sit.. ultimate little kidlet. the sun warms like nothing else, really. not a fireplace, not a vent. those are both nice, but different. the sun makes cigarette smoke smell different to me. i don't mind it so...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
sethy:
I am glad your in a good mod... cuz good moods are, uh, good.
So hows the spider from yesterday doing?
[Edited on Apr 13, 2003]
So hows the spider from yesterday doing?
[Edited on Apr 13, 2003]
morgan:
Me?! I'm so tipsy it's AMAZING!
i'm really not a big fan of going to bars and not drinking. especially not going to bars when i think i'm only going to be there for an hour, and volunteering to drive, and then staying for four hours watching other people drink. my sweetie's dad was playing (he's in a blues band) and so the music was good, but dammit, that's just not...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
stickyrice:
What did you think of Joyce Maynard auctioning off J.D. Salinger's old love letters?
I know what you mean about drinking. To the extent it's fun, it's fun at home ... either alone or with a carefully selected other or two.
I know what you mean about drinking. To the extent it's fun, it's fun at home ... either alone or with a carefully selected other or two.
stickyrice:
But ... but ... I want to be the *only* one! 
slept through class.. i went to bed at like 11pm last night, set my alarm for 10am (first class is at 1..) couldn't sleep, got up, went back to bed at 5am. alarm went off at 10am, i thought "fuck this," and turned it off. didn't reset it, though. woke up again at 2. shit. and i did 3 hours of german homework for that...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
frank_castle:
i only need five hours of sleep, and i am good, so you will do better tomorrow wake up to something like folgers in your cup
twwly:
i am **terrible** at sleeping through class. meetings. appointments. work. yup!
happier.. things get better towards the weekends.. i have twentyfive sources in my bibliography, which is more than i thought i'd have, but not enough. oh well - my writing's the only thing that matters, i guess.
i went to talk to the career services people about becoming an advertising person today.. it's never encouraging to hear the career lady say "well, i don't want...
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i went to talk to the career services people about becoming an advertising person today.. it's never encouraging to hear the career lady say "well, i don't want...
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VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
stickyrice:
Mei ... although it's a harder road (or maybe not) than advertising, I can't recommend enough that you pursue the writing. I send you good vibes and, if I could, Nam Sod.
sethy:
Glad that things are going better.
And dont wish to be a smoker, its nasty, thats like the biggest turnoff ever...
I know where your coming from though, I used to always rake off the pop top things on sodas and chew on those, I have a weird thing where it annoys me to no end to be perfectly still, so I usually am chewing on something like gum, bits of plastic, shirt collars, messing with tongue ring, things like that.
okay ill shup up now and go away
And dont wish to be a smoker, its nasty, thats like the biggest turnoff ever...
I know where your coming from though, I used to always rake off the pop top things on sodas and chew on those, I have a weird thing where it annoys me to no end to be perfectly still, so I usually am chewing on something like gum, bits of plastic, shirt collars, messing with tongue ring, things like that.
okay ill shup up now and go away
well, the dance went ok.. i felt dumb, but then it was over. i still feel kind of dumb for having done it, but we got good comments on what to work on. it needs a lot of work. it wasn't all in all that bad, though. i feel a little bit better, but we're still really fucking poor. the lecturers were my boyo and...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
rebeldaisy:
outside i see the tops of trees, with no leaves yet.
you're writing reminds me of sylvia plath, particularly her journals. or maybe it's just the fact that i've been reading her writing and now reading your journal it's kinda like hers...
you're writing reminds me of sylvia plath, particularly her journals. or maybe it's just the fact that i've been reading her writing and now reading your journal it's kinda like hers...
alexkarina:
You are so beautiful and such an elegant writer. Can you please write me custom vinyl poem?
Mei asked what is "a custom vinyl poem"?
I don't know--I just coined the phrase. It's a poem, written especially for the recipient, but kind of slick and sexy like vinyl. Ya dig? Oh, yes, when I look out my window right now I see the neon beer signs in the bar on the Brooklyn street below me, lots of hipsters walking towards Greenpoint, and some punk-ass kids hanging on a stoop. Not too many dangerous sea creatures...
[Edited on Apr 10, 2003]
Mei asked what is "a custom vinyl poem"?
I don't know--I just coined the phrase. It's a poem, written especially for the recipient, but kind of slick and sexy like vinyl. Ya dig?
Oh, yes, when I look out my window right now I see the neon beer signs in the bar on the Brooklyn street below me, lots of hipsters walking towards Greenpoint, and some punk-ass kids hanging on a stoop. Not too many dangerous sea creatures...
[Edited on Apr 10, 2003]
i've been lectured for multiple hours three times in the last two days. all about finances and the future. why? i worry about this shit enough on my own. i don't need anyone to remind me time and again about it.
stress is a big stone in my chest. i can't quite breathe right. if i look in the mirror, i can see my heart...
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stress is a big stone in my chest. i can't quite breathe right. if i look in the mirror, i can see my heart...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
stickyrice:
I hope your dance went OK, or at least that the fucking thing is over. You don't sound like a generally comic sort of person to me, and I could imagine you feeling strange -- to say the least -- attempting a goofy dance when you'd rather do something worthwhile.
Who's lecturing you? I hope it's not the gang that lured you into funny dancing. Whoever it is, they don't sound like they have your best interests in mind -- or, if they do, they're not paying attention to you, to your reactions. Which amounts to the same thing.
I don't know you well, but my guess is that once you separate yourself from people who don't care about you and stop doing ridiculous things such as funny dances, you'll find your way clearer. Finances have a way of getting taken care of, as long as you stay mindful and not panicky about getting them taken care of. That's how it was for me, anyhow ... although I've never done funny dancing. Wait. All the dancing I do is funny.
I'm a big fan of your brain structures, even if they act up now and then.
And: I am sending you cheer beams. (That sounds like a new kind of candy ... )
Who's lecturing you? I hope it's not the gang that lured you into funny dancing. Whoever it is, they don't sound like they have your best interests in mind -- or, if they do, they're not paying attention to you, to your reactions. Which amounts to the same thing.
I don't know you well, but my guess is that once you separate yourself from people who don't care about you and stop doing ridiculous things such as funny dances, you'll find your way clearer. Finances have a way of getting taken care of, as long as you stay mindful and not panicky about getting them taken care of. That's how it was for me, anyhow ... although I've never done funny dancing. Wait. All the dancing I do is funny.
I'm a big fan of your brain structures, even if they act up now and then.
And: I am sending you cheer beams. (That sounds like a new kind of candy ... )
rubbersoul:
Who is doing the lecturing?
"Anger, nervousness and guilt"
can be beautiful...uh...can't it?
Now the food part,
that's a drag.
"Anger, nervousness and guilt"
can be beautiful...uh...can't it?
Now the food part,
that's a drag.
hope you're ok, you sound a bit stressed.
ok tell me to fuck off because I don't know you, but... know where you're coming from with the meds. It's been a while since I've been on anything (thank god, or whoever) but I can still remember what it's like. Like thinking through cotton wool or something.
It'll be ok though. trust me.
xxx