I'm not bitching, I'm worrying.
I feel torn between positive and negative lately, I feel like i have lots to be positive about, and usually I'm very good at omitting the negative and only concentrate on the positive. I haven't really had the usual seasonal depression lately, Part of me thinks i dodged the usual SAD and part of me thinks it's Post seasonal depression, what ever that is.
I just got a new car this week, my very 1st car. I'm a bit of a late bloomer I guess.
And though i am leasing it's a whole new financial responsibility, and i think that may have killed a little bit of my " 1st Car Glee "
Esp considering it's a crappy economical time.
Either lack of heat or warmth, i am feeling unattractive or soft, and not Soft in a good way. Soft like Old fruit.
I have shoots planned out the ass right now, a 2 day workshop
Trips to NY, Atlanta, Vegas and LA all before June.
Now is not a good time to feel a lack of confidence or like old fruit.
I'm also worried about the health and life span of my dogs, and Mother. neither which are in any dire straights but the inevitable looming is in the front of my brain for some reason.
I think it could bad case of when shit is going right, something is bound to go wrong. I hate wasting energy on thoughts like this, but lately they seem to be haunting me.
As far as my relationship goes, it's temperamental, some days it's bliss and other day's I'm reminded or told it's just going through the motions. and I'm usually told this when i think things are going nicely, which then puts me in a shitty mood, and what else am i to do but continue life.
Things could be better, but then they sure could be worse.
Instead i am wasting energy and emotions thinking and worrying about shit that will eventually happen but has yet to.
I feel torn between positive and negative lately, I feel like i have lots to be positive about, and usually I'm very good at omitting the negative and only concentrate on the positive. I haven't really had the usual seasonal depression lately, Part of me thinks i dodged the usual SAD and part of me thinks it's Post seasonal depression, what ever that is.
I just got a new car this week, my very 1st car. I'm a bit of a late bloomer I guess.
And though i am leasing it's a whole new financial responsibility, and i think that may have killed a little bit of my " 1st Car Glee "
Esp considering it's a crappy economical time.
Either lack of heat or warmth, i am feeling unattractive or soft, and not Soft in a good way. Soft like Old fruit.
I have shoots planned out the ass right now, a 2 day workshop
Trips to NY, Atlanta, Vegas and LA all before June.
Now is not a good time to feel a lack of confidence or like old fruit.
I'm also worried about the health and life span of my dogs, and Mother. neither which are in any dire straights but the inevitable looming is in the front of my brain for some reason.
I think it could bad case of when shit is going right, something is bound to go wrong. I hate wasting energy on thoughts like this, but lately they seem to be haunting me.
As far as my relationship goes, it's temperamental, some days it's bliss and other day's I'm reminded or told it's just going through the motions. and I'm usually told this when i think things are going nicely, which then puts me in a shitty mood, and what else am i to do but continue life.
Things could be better, but then they sure could be worse.
Instead i am wasting energy and emotions thinking and worrying about shit that will eventually happen but has yet to.
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
As for lifespans, it's hard to avoid the realization that all life ends sometime, but focusing on that reality isn't going to change it. Focus on today, go take your beautiful dogs for a walk or drive your new car fast (not too fast) on a curvy road, blow off some steam.
As for relationships, I go through the motions as much as I don't. We all do. When you're with someone long enough you get so used to them the day-to-day just gets boring sometimes. It's the downside of having a good, stable relationship. Maybe you could shake it up a bit: how would he look in you maids outfit from your last set?
Try the Lobster Bisque at the new M casino that opened up a few weeks ago.
Much much better than Korean food.
Old fruit ??? Remember what I told you about Sophia Loren.