mavericka

I just can't let that last post sit there its just too ugly. Very late last night i finally fell asleep with a wet towel on my forehead. I finally got the break i needed and I feel very greatful today. And my headache was gone when i woke up i was starting to think it would never go away. When i woke up i ended up alone again and after awhile i started to crack alittle so i put on an old country song i haven't heard since i was a little kid and had my pity party good and proper. i managed to get all teary without getting hysterical and it was very theraputic, a good release. Like every counselor i've ever been to has told me i hold it in till it explodes. This time it just leaked. Although i will admit i got all jesus in the temple with the people at the hospital, i would have been better off going to a witch doctor. It would take a book for me to explain what happened there.
I'm going to miss the play, funny how i remembered never liking it and yet enjoyed every minute of it this time that i wasn't in a lot of pain. Its also kinda funny how people get so upset and suprised when there is drama at the playhouse. Yes it was high drama at this production. But the biggest problem was the lead dudes ego, and an actor with a huge ego doesn't seem like it should be a surprise to me either. The director is used to working with teenagers that worship the ground he walks on, and i hope he doesn't read that but oh well its true. That actor was very wrong and did more than one completely unacceptable thing. I'm not defending him at all, but it turned into an ego fight. And what was best for the show, which was a fund raiser at a charity organisation got lost. Magically the audiences never knew the difference.
Which brings up the topic of me being discovered on here by the people from my home town. One person finding me on here in my paranoid mind equals the whole town reading about my hotel adventures that happened like a year ago. Fuck you all very much. Hometown phsycotic lesbian gets finger fucked, news at 11.
Anyway it was funny cause all the teenagers in town hang out at the coffee shop accross the street from the theatre, which stays open late for performances. So that whole little section of the charming red bricked street in town gets covered in teenagers. Well last night they were about 15 of them hanging out right in front of the theatre for some reason taking pictures and getting piggy back rides and wooting and hollering. while we were trying to have a very tender show about old people and relationships. For some reason i thought they were the directors students, which would be from another town. But no they were from here. So i had the brilliant idea that my mother go down there and ask them to keep it down alittle, and it backfired beautifully when she stuck out her head and all her students chanted her name in unison like Norm had just walked into cheers. Sometimes it seems like she's the most famous person in town cause she's taught everyone. We can't go anywhere without someone coming up to her to tell her what they've been doing with their lives or ask her about a homework assignment.
Geez a bunch of friends just popped online and want to chat while i was in the process of the most amazing journal entry that was ever written by a human in this solar system. I know you are sad now so i will leave you with my song.

i bet you never knew innocentsid was in a singing group with charles manson. and i'm pretty sure that guy with the huge grey toupee is bald eagle before he accepted his natural state.