maurauder

Well, last night was certainly...sureal. I went over to Fractal's house with the boy and the dogs, which is always a pleasure but not that alarming. So she was like, "Oh, my friends S--- and Olivia are visiting from out of town. Oh wait, you know them from the site!" And then who was to knock at the door, but Olivia and s5. It was so strange, mostly because it was so unexpected, but also because it was my first experience with trying to comprehend the suicide world transposed into my real world, and the avatars were actually talking to me, and it just boggled my little brain!

It was a whole lotta fun though. They are really cool people and we ended up walking the dogs on the beach and drinking 40's of Old E. (which was Olivia's first experience with 40's; the don't have them in New Zealand!!!). The beach is so beautiful at night and it was warm and the dogs were in heaven and the conversation was good...yeah, I should leave the house more often.

Also, I smoked. I have been seriously considering starting again. I just feel like, at this point in my life, I don't know if not being a smoker is worth my happiness. And it really does affect me. I have been sad and depressed ever since I quit. It sucks. So I'm glad I smoked, because it wasn't as great as I remembered, and I woke up this morning with a rasp in my chest that had been gone for a while. So I think I'll continue to not smoke, or else I'll smoke, but I'm done kicking my ass about it. We'll see. I need coffee...

What did YOU do on your Saturday night?