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mastercraftsman

a military brat (moved a lot)

Member Since 2005

Followers 32 Following 38

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Friday Feb 17, 2006

Feb 17, 2006
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A long life may not be good enough, but a good life is long enough. Or I am still hoping. So lonely and reminiscent now. Even though the frisbee floated a good 60-80 yards after my spiritual windup. Me and the dog could be an olympic event. For alchoholic loser AWOL bums....
So today I am still horribly horny; depressed, and suicidal.
NO happy go lucky yay guy. Sunny and 68, in short sleeves, and sad.
Still like to eat goodness. Smoked salmon on the grill, avacado and bean sprouts ready to slap on some toasted garlic bread, sprinkled with ricotta and fresh ground pepper.
A fisherman's sandwich.
Great things seem to happen when I'm about to die. Damn. Not going there again.
Bubba asked me a question today. Came over wearing a T-shirt emblazoned "BEEFCAKE," even though his belly hung out, stretching it thin. "Dean-Man, give it up!" I hi- five him. "So Dude, what's your dream car?" Guys love our vehicles. I had to think a bit, as I'd been "rich" for a bit and driven whatever I wanted(Jag, Porsche, BMW). "I guess a new Crown Victoria, equipped like an undercover cop, you know, tinted windows, the spotlight, antennae, the works..."
He stood supified. Well, he often does that. "What a DUMBASS..." He says.
"Well, you can park where you want. Drive how you feel without worrying about road rage. Prostitutes, panhandlers, drugdealers, window washers walk the other way when you approach a stoplight. Cops won't even fuck with you. Catch my drift?"
Highlight of my day. Until tomorrow when I meet the GRANDMASTER. Peace.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
dharmabox:
hey if you eve need to just talk out some shit i'll give you my number off line. i've had plenty of days like that. shit just likes to hit you when you arent't looking i swear. let me now and i'llpm it to you. might do me some good as well. it's ggod to share with others. i've been doing a lot of metta practice lately naming people both those i like and don't like and reading a llot of pema chdrn when things fall aprt and listening to true happiness on cd. i have also been rereading instructions to the cook living a life that mattters by bernie glassman and rick fields (rip)
that book came out in 1996 and i stilll have my hardback copy of it. i will never let it go.

best to you brother!
Feb 19, 2006
dmac:
Hey! Do NOT use words like "suicidal" in your journal and then disappear for days! You scare me! frown You okay?
Feb 19, 2006

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