so it's times like these i love having an SG account and no one else i know does.
I've realized that i've slightly reverted back to that geeky high school stage of developing crushes which isnt really a good thing when you're in a serious relationship so i'm glad i have somewhere to empty my mind where i wont have to worry about people who dont understand trying to grasp what i say without blowing the whole thing out of control. Like, i started a new job (im a fucking cashier at a grocery store...but moneys money) and theres a bagger there named josh who hits on me and flirts with me all the time, and the other day he told me he likes me, well, the last time we worked together i started to realize i was starting to crush on him...not in the "i'm going to run out and leave my boyfriend" way more in the i'd really like to develop a more in depth friendship and definitely begin corrupting him ha. The insane thing is he's 18, has never smoked, done drugs, drank, or had sex...so now i'm definitely wanting to take him out partying if i can convince him to drop his straight edge charade for a night, it sounds terrible...but i'm a firm believer that you should try it once before you swear it off. Anyways, at this point its all just been on my mind a lot and its probably terrible to think about other people when youre with someone else...but its not always easy to think about only one person for the rest of your life when you're young. Obviously i don't want to lose the guy i have because hes great and i love him..but sometimes i wonder what i'm missing especially when i meet someone like josh. I guess im terrible, but the thought of corrupting someone so innocent just sounds totally fucking sexy...alright...no more redbull when im half awake, it makes me think too fucking much.
Xoxo
Marauder
So i guess the real question is...
Is it normal to develop crushes still when you love the person you're with? Or am i just really fucking weird
I've realized that i've slightly reverted back to that geeky high school stage of developing crushes which isnt really a good thing when you're in a serious relationship so i'm glad i have somewhere to empty my mind where i wont have to worry about people who dont understand trying to grasp what i say without blowing the whole thing out of control. Like, i started a new job (im a fucking cashier at a grocery store...but moneys money) and theres a bagger there named josh who hits on me and flirts with me all the time, and the other day he told me he likes me, well, the last time we worked together i started to realize i was starting to crush on him...not in the "i'm going to run out and leave my boyfriend" way more in the i'd really like to develop a more in depth friendship and definitely begin corrupting him ha. The insane thing is he's 18, has never smoked, done drugs, drank, or had sex...so now i'm definitely wanting to take him out partying if i can convince him to drop his straight edge charade for a night, it sounds terrible...but i'm a firm believer that you should try it once before you swear it off. Anyways, at this point its all just been on my mind a lot and its probably terrible to think about other people when youre with someone else...but its not always easy to think about only one person for the rest of your life when you're young. Obviously i don't want to lose the guy i have because hes great and i love him..but sometimes i wonder what i'm missing especially when i meet someone like josh. I guess im terrible, but the thought of corrupting someone so innocent just sounds totally fucking sexy...alright...no more redbull when im half awake, it makes me think too fucking much.
Xoxo
Marauder
So i guess the real question is...
Is it normal to develop crushes still when you love the person you're with? Or am i just really fucking weird
I dont know everything but..I am older than you. So Im going to ramble on a bit like those old geezers do.
I once heard that there are three kinds of love, three stages if you will. I saw this on PBS, so it must be true.
There is the first stage; early infatuation / walking on air / geez your ass looks great kind of love. This is the love / lust at first sight kind of thing.
Then there is a middle stage; which I forget anything about. (Hey, give me a break, Im older than you and sometimes when you get older, your memory starts to go!)
Then there is the last stage of love. This stage, as it is the last one, can run the gambit. Its everything from crying at your wedding, to lets make a baby, to the feelings your grandparents had when they looked at each other in the eyes.
With this last stage of love, you have to make an important realization. You can still find each other attractive and have wild monkey sex. One would figure that this holds true more for the newly married couple than the grandparents. But you arent going to have that kind of sexy awkward tension, not like when you were still in that first stage of love.
Basically, you have to make a trade-off. The animal attraction fades but you get something better in return. But they said that you have more than one stage at a time. If your relationship survives long enough, it moves towards the last stage eventually. I guess you cant get sick around each other or share a bathroom with someone and stay at that first stage of love. You can have fun but its a different kind of fun.
So to cut it short or shorter anyway. Yes it is normal, what is happening to you. But if you really love your man, you got to nip this shit in the bud. (Borrowing a phrase from my man there. And by the way, he was 20 when we first met. He was 20 and I was 7 years older!) You know that you are a very, very pretty lady and that you are going to have men falling all over for you for decades to come. (Hell, you might have some girls falling over you too.) There is probably nothing at all special about this new guy, hes just new. There will always be a new guy. Each new guy means asking if your man that you have now is still worth being with.
Its your decision and only yours alone. But I think that its a decision worth making, you owe your current guy that at least. One guy at a time, you know? Its the only decent thing to do.
Oh and have a very Happy New Year!!
Thank you very much for your words of wisdom =] and I'm glad I kept to my general "stand offish" routine with any person who hits on me and got to know this guy better before even really considering "dating others", because he turned out to be just one of your good ol' fashion regular jackasses lol..I draw them in like metal to a magnet ha,
Anyways,
Thank you very much and I hope you have a happy new year as well.