makeupandsin

I would love to know when these ups and downs will end and i can just be happy.

While i am glad that my friend Tricia is home and its nothing too serious (she lived to tell the tale) I have to say that I am really hurt. I was out of school for 2 full days and not one person even noticed. While Tricia wasn't even gone for a full day and everyone was all worried. I was worried too, and I don't want to come off as a whiny child, but my closest friends didn't notice. I've been sitting here and it hurt my feelings that no one noticed I was missing for 2 days. Am I that unimportant, or forgettable? that's how i legitimately feel. We all have family issues and mine have been coming to a head lately, and i value my friends more then my family and i feel closer to you guys then I've ever felt with my family, but you guys are forgetting me like my family does and it hurts. I don't know what I'm expecting from this but that's my feelings, and sorry if I sound immature.

This is someone who i thought I was really close to, i even wanted her to be a bridesmaid in my wedding. she got pissed and i got hurt. she said she tried to kill herself after i tried to talk to her about my feelings and I understand what shes going through cause i've been there done that. I am not trying to minimize her pain or anything but what boggles MY mind is the fact that i try and tell her how i'm feeling and she get mad at me. how is that far? i try to always be there for her and i understand not telling everyone through facebook or whatever, but she made it seem like i should have already known and be sympathetic towards her, how can i do that if i have no idea whats going on and i think she had a kidney infection. and i see that she's been posting textsfromlastnight so i thought she felt better so excuse me. my family makes me feel unimportant and everyone i know confirms it and instead of ignoring it and feeling animosity towards people who i thought i was close to, I tried to be mature and address it and instead of saying I'm going though alot you get mad at me, i didn't attack her but she certainly attacked me. but now i wont bother any of them with my feelings ever again and if everyone has such an issue i'll make it simple for everyone and just stop coming into the room. Honestly, no one would notice anyway that's been proven.

this is what i wrote to her this morning and still no answer

I have no friends

I feel so alone.