lsd25

my. fucking. thesis. is. due. in. three. days.

(time out from hyperventilating to look at pretty ladys.)

i'm alternating clonazepam and adderall. they interact dialectically. well, only in that i'm not scratching the skin off my face and also i'm not nodding off every five minutes. but that's dialectical enuf for me.

i am never ever ever ever going to be a student again in my whole life i swear. must now expel years of accumulated knowledge and hearsay in one sweeping gesture of academic legitimacy. wtf??

<here comes the self doubt> i shouldn't have come back to school. i should have stayed working at that video store smoking weed. really, i was better off before becoming a repository of radical political economy. i mean, how many words and historical factoids does it take to really, really reinforce the belief that you shouldn't be an asshole and that you should share your stuff?

hopefully this will resolve itself without me throwing plates again.

sigh.

anyway, i hope sgprovidence gets going--it'll be nice to chilly chill with people come summer.