lostidentity

Thank goodness for this rockers show! I just heard mastadon for the first time...gettin it! or probably should get it from someone else and make a copy? Nevertheless, the biggest surprise came from Sarah. The cd is just full of dark sweet moments and I didn't really expect the whole cd to be like that. I had heard Angel once and I thought it was really cool. I've always been the artistic one, and I loathe poetry and art, but I've never had the talent to put whats in my head onto a canvass or a pencil. Why is it that I like people who have what I don't?

I read Synnove's journal and was stricken with a few moments of sadness. The guy who lost his g/f really got my emotions going. He never had any luck with the ladies and finally got one and then she died. Godddammmit!!! I feel that misery so much within me right now. I hate hearing stories about people my age/around my age dying. I don't think I'm afraid to die. The keyword there is 'think'. Maybe I am. Death is one of the very rare things in life that are guaranteed. Even getting old isn't guaranteed. Carefull what you wish for, you just might get it. I hope that someday the loneliness within me will disappear, but I never want to forget it. Just makes you appreciate things more. I don't ever recall going through this. This is tough and extremely exhausting. I actually cried at work today listening to one of my greek oldies songs "I am an eagle without wings". I quickly slammed the cd player door open. Why do people have to deal with this?