lolablu

I might be surprised by who would show. Who would grieve most outwardly. Who would feel more than he or she let on. Whose life would change. Who would be disturbed by an absence of change. Who would laugh (about something else, of course) at the wake.

And where would I be for all these surprises?

I need to be here to be surprised. As...
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I'm not sure whether last night made me feel better or worse. Let's just say things got "interesting." Don't feel like providing details. Just assume they would be salacious.

Ugh. Nausea from adapting to new meds. So much confusion in my life. Heart palpitations. Loneliness. Fear.

Last night, as I was riding the subway home from work, the train suddenly stopped. We passengers rolled our eyes at another inconvenient subway delay. And then we heard the shaky-voiced announcement of the conductor: someone was under the train. Fifteen or so minutes later, an EMT walked through all the cars, explaining, "The individual under the train has... passed." During the next hour, police...
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Tomorrow is a new day, and I start a new prescription.

I feel like there is something so fundamentally wrong with me that I will never be "right." I'm seeing my psychiatrist tomorrow and changing meds, because I cannot tolerate the sick, obsessive fantasies I have been having. I do not like being my own worst enemy.

Please, if you know or suspect that someone you care about is struggling with depression, be there to listen...
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Some days I'm in the mood to talk to strangers, and today was one of those days. I was strolling in Manhattan and found a friendly stranger to stroll with for 15 minutes or so. When Friendly Stranger and I parted ways, I gave him a hug, and he commented, "I love your fragrance!" I simply said "thank you" and refrained from elaborating, "It's Eau...
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I just found out one of my friends from treatment is in the hospital. My heart really goes out to her, because, obviously, I can identify with her struggle. Please send some positive thoughts out into the universe for her. She's only 17 and so smart and wonderful. She deserves to have a full, fulfilling life ahead of her.

Normally I don't much care for celebrity gossip, but UK gossip rags have reported that Lindsay Lohan plans a commitment ceremony with Samantha Ronson at Dollywood. I want this story to be true so badly. Marrying Sam at Dollywood would be the best decision Lindsay ever made because, one, lesbians rule. And two, Dollywood is awesome. The idea of lesbianism and Dollywood forming a union...
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