I'd like to know that your love
is a love I can be sure of
so tell me now, and I won't ask again
will you still love me tomorrow?
...
That's it, there is NO WAY I am reading ANY thread on the music board ever again, unless it's the band name game, but even then I'm probably treading dangerous waters, especially with my insistence on posting weird bands. Or "what song is stuck in your head"... but again, dangerous waters
Yuck. If you need a lesson on being unpleasant, read a few threads on the music board. If I see someone going in there just to outright diss a music act without qualifying their attitude, my respect for them will drop a few notches. I have learned at this point that dissing and getting dissed is very fucking awful. Be a friend: don't do it.
So Olivia read my SG Army FAQ which is really cool because she didn't know the sticker gallery invisible images bug was still going on and didn't know about the bug that tells you you only get 1 point for sticker photos or banners, so she's fixing it with the next site update. w00t! I helped stuff happen! She also gave me the official word from Sean on banner nudity: no nips or beaver. Now the faq is bigger and better. Well, not much bigger. Just better. I'm thinking now to start a thread asking about the details of certain specific army prizes, what you can expect if you redeem your points for them, how they work and such. I wonder if anyone's ever actually done the roundtrip tickets to watch Missy shoot a set. And since I'm eyeing the autographed photo prize I'm curious about it too, like do you get to choose the girl and stuff.
It's pretty darn cool they gave me 250 points for writing that thing. SteveNeurotic got 500 points for his "SG Army" vanity license plate, you know. I suddenly just wondered if a person could arrange to just get a crapload of army points instead of the lifetime membership on SG for the logo tattoo... I think it's been asked before maybe. A lifetime membership doesn't get you the cool prizes
In the kitties group people were talking about how great cats are to pick up on your mood and be very loving and affectionate in your time of need. Sabrina is totally not like that ever. I tried to hug her just now and the bitch tried to bite me. Everyone's shitting all over me lately. Well, she is anyway.
I'm feeling like just going on vacation from my other journal for a while, people involved with the recent turmoil can all read it. Or I may just stick to silly frivolous entries so I don't get any more talkings-to for a while. I mean, I value my friends' input, but because of recent events they're voicing concern in a way that's hard to hear, and it really really really sucks. The advice I get from other friends who weren't involved, including some of you, is not tinged with, perhaps, hurt feelings because of things that happened. That may not be a fair assessment, but when I talk about serious things in that journal, I get serious talks from these friends in return. Serious talks are very scary for me. Things that border on, or are, criticism really hurt. Also, a very intense level of communication is required, both from myself and others, that takes a whole lot of work and is very stressful.
Honestly I could turn off comments for all of my journal entries, or some. But I've already done things like that with that journal that have upset people, and that might just upset people more. I don't generally like when people turn off their comments.
A lot of times when I was younger I would wish I could find myself in a room full of junk equipped with a baseball bat and just destroy everything in sight. I haven't wished that recently but now I do. I want a way to give a big fuck you to the world right now. Maybe I can put an SG sticker in a really offensive place, like in a church or something. This is a time when I ask things like "what can I break and not get into trouble?" or "how can I punch something without hurting myself too badly?" At least I stay realistic and reasonable when I'm angry. But then I'm not that angry. Just really sad.
What's funny is "Happy Without You" is my least favorite Annie track and yet it seems to be the song that most readily gets stuck in my head. I don't know why. It's happened with other tracks by other artists, songs I'm not crazy about either. Maybe I can think of some examples later.
I'm so sensitive now! Even something that isn't a direct diss hurts my feelings a bit! Somebody made a bit of a mocking comment about GBAs being made in pink and purple. I have a purple GBA
And I love it! So they're cussing something that I love If things weren't going on already I'd probably think nothing of it, but now everything is getting to me.
I forgot to say the story of my buying The Art of Happiness by Howard Cutler and the Dalai Lama. I discovered and joined the Nutrition and Diet group just today (or yesterday now), which is good because I really need advice on rehabbing my diet like I said. In one thread, Olivia recommended The Art of Happiness to another member, and I literally rushed right out almost straightaway and bought it. It's not often that I feel compelled to rush right out and buy something. Good thing I got it, too. At moments I feel like I'm dying inside. Maybe I should go back and read Jane Goodall's Reason for Hope. She was my first real hero I think, and is still pretty much the only one.
Although I told jonnytrrrash7 earlier that Annie is my hero for the Chewing Gum video alone. X-O Oh man. That is the height of seck-see right there. Sure wish I could shake my can like Annie... can. Seriously I am pretty in awe of girls that can dance good. And she dances REAL good. *melts*
Oh yeah and Mei is my hero for being as hairy as, if not hairer than, I am. EW GROSS huh? Seriously though, us super-hairy ladies need to stick together. We can comb each other's stomach hair and braid each other's pits, it'll be fun. Tune in for another "more than you wanted to know about CruxbaseAlpha" next time.
I just discovered that the word "manko" is Japanese for the vag. As if Manko wasn't cool enough already.
I really like the "mad" emoticon: That little dude conveys what I'm feeling so well, so many times over. Thank you, mad guy.
I was thinking to start a thread about dreads. I'm curious as to what leads... well, white people, to get dreads. What significance does it hold for them? What about the people who do it just because they think it looks good?
I thought up something to say in case I have to defend Annie's honor on here some day:
"People, Annie's just a cute and sexy Norwegian lady who never hurt nobody nohow. All she's out to do is make good pop music. Sure, she doesn't have the best voice, and her lyrics are nothing special most of the time, but you don't need either of those to make great pop music, and that's what her music is. (to be continued)"
It needs to be finished but it starts off good. I kind of dissed her myself though, didn't I?
Well, I'm not always worshipping at Annie's feet though I might give the impression I am. Pobody's nerfect and neither is Annie. Besides, in trying to explain to the h8rs, it would make me look better if I make sure that I'm not just giving a purely glowing review of mah gurl. Not like those hatas will listen anyway, but whatevz As I thought this up in my head in the shower (seriously in my spare time I sit around and think up things to write in my journal... it's a sickness 
) I also thought of a rant to say against all those -inducing people on the music board. It sounded pretty good in my head but I think it was basically exactly what I just said at the top of this entry. Dissin' without qualifyin' and such. Come on, people.
Meh. I think my Annie-defendin' speech would fall on deaf ears... and get dissed itself, of course. But I like describing Annie as a "cute and sexy Norwegian lady who never hurt nobody nohow". It makes me feel lurve in my heart. And that's what the world needs now. Love, sweet love. No, not just for some. But for everyonnnnnne.
I actually like Burt Bacharach too. Another window into the weird world of CruxbaseAlpha's musical tastes. If you see me walking down the street, and I start to cry each time we meet, walk on byyyyyyyy... The moment I wake up, before I put on my makeup, I say a little prayer for yooooooou. I think that is some good songwriting right there.
What Annie's official site needs are some cell phone wallpapers. Ringtones I can live without. I would like to see Annie every time I open my phone though. Hey I need to find an Annie desktop wallpaper. Good idea Carolyn. I'm glad you thought of that. In checking her official site for what must be the five millionth time this month, I saw the monthly giveaway thing and joined the official mailing list. Haven't received my confirmation email yet though. What's up like that.
HE WAS MY HONEY
HE WAS MY HONEY
HAPPY WITHOUT NO HONEY
I don't get why it gets stuck in my head so much, I really don't. And now the official site is offering limited edition 12"s of remixes of that song. Weird.
...
I'm tired and sad. I can't escape.
I haven't had to deal with a constant sadness that won't go away in a long time. I'm not sure how to deal with it. "It'll pass" as people say, but it's making me want to just shut down and stay under the covers for a few weeks now. That makes me sad, too, because only a couple days ago I was still able to stay fairly upbeat. I guess it hadn't hit me completely then. That sucks so bad.
Thank you guys for your kind words. I really really really appreciate your support.
Actually in Girls Only someone advised one of the ladies to "keep busy" to get through a rough time... I think that is exactly what I need to do. Since I wasn't busy to begin with I'll have to figure out how to get busy now. It will be hard since it's become so hard to function because of this. I worry that doing puzzles and playing my Gameboy might not cut the mustard. Maybe it'd be a good start though. And for gosh sakes I need to get over my feeling overwhelmed and get myself to clean my room. Cleaning my room is something I struggle with so much. It makes me crazy and freaked out and unhappy. But the chore might help take my mind off things, and I need to do it because my room is scary.
I wonder if canoeing season on the lake is closed. Or it might be good to do some artistic stuff... I wish I could paint. No supplies and don't really know where to start though. Drawing isn't really calming for me anymore. Though it might be neat if I could find a picture that conveys how I'm feeling and just draw it. Even if I never show it to anybody.
Hmm. It might be silly to think this about porn but maybe I should ask around if there is a photoset on here that makes someone feel better about life. Not all of them are just plain raunchy. I find lithium_picnic's sets have a calming effect on me sometimes because of the style and look of the photography, and the way the stories are told. And there are silly ones... Alexis' sets are pretty silly. I liked the toilet monster one
I think it's high time I ordered those sudoku books I have in my Amazon cart. Unfortunately it says they won't ship until August. wtf. I want them now. If I were to get one day shipping I'd have to pay an extra 25 bucks. That's too much :-\\ Well, at least I have the puzzles on that site I just liked to. But there's something calming about sitting in an armchair with a pencil and solving puzzles in a book. Darn.
is a love I can be sure of
so tell me now, and I won't ask again
will you still love me tomorrow?
...
That's it, there is NO WAY I am reading ANY thread on the music board ever again, unless it's the band name game, but even then I'm probably treading dangerous waters, especially with my insistence on posting weird bands. Or "what song is stuck in your head"... but again, dangerous waters
Yuck. If you need a lesson on being unpleasant, read a few threads on the music board. If I see someone going in there just to outright diss a music act without qualifying their attitude, my respect for them will drop a few notches. I have learned at this point that dissing and getting dissed is very fucking awful. Be a friend: don't do it.
So Olivia read my SG Army FAQ which is really cool because she didn't know the sticker gallery invisible images bug was still going on and didn't know about the bug that tells you you only get 1 point for sticker photos or banners, so she's fixing it with the next site update. w00t! I helped stuff happen! She also gave me the official word from Sean on banner nudity: no nips or beaver. Now the faq is bigger and better. Well, not much bigger. Just better. I'm thinking now to start a thread asking about the details of certain specific army prizes, what you can expect if you redeem your points for them, how they work and such. I wonder if anyone's ever actually done the roundtrip tickets to watch Missy shoot a set. And since I'm eyeing the autographed photo prize I'm curious about it too, like do you get to choose the girl and stuff.
It's pretty darn cool they gave me 250 points for writing that thing. SteveNeurotic got 500 points for his "SG Army" vanity license plate, you know. I suddenly just wondered if a person could arrange to just get a crapload of army points instead of the lifetime membership on SG for the logo tattoo... I think it's been asked before maybe. A lifetime membership doesn't get you the cool prizes
In the kitties group people were talking about how great cats are to pick up on your mood and be very loving and affectionate in your time of need. Sabrina is totally not like that ever. I tried to hug her just now and the bitch tried to bite me. Everyone's shitting all over me lately. Well, she is anyway.
I'm feeling like just going on vacation from my other journal for a while, people involved with the recent turmoil can all read it. Or I may just stick to silly frivolous entries so I don't get any more talkings-to for a while. I mean, I value my friends' input, but because of recent events they're voicing concern in a way that's hard to hear, and it really really really sucks. The advice I get from other friends who weren't involved, including some of you, is not tinged with, perhaps, hurt feelings because of things that happened. That may not be a fair assessment, but when I talk about serious things in that journal, I get serious talks from these friends in return. Serious talks are very scary for me. Things that border on, or are, criticism really hurt. Also, a very intense level of communication is required, both from myself and others, that takes a whole lot of work and is very stressful.
Honestly I could turn off comments for all of my journal entries, or some. But I've already done things like that with that journal that have upset people, and that might just upset people more. I don't generally like when people turn off their comments.
A lot of times when I was younger I would wish I could find myself in a room full of junk equipped with a baseball bat and just destroy everything in sight. I haven't wished that recently but now I do. I want a way to give a big fuck you to the world right now. Maybe I can put an SG sticker in a really offensive place, like in a church or something. This is a time when I ask things like "what can I break and not get into trouble?" or "how can I punch something without hurting myself too badly?" At least I stay realistic and reasonable when I'm angry. But then I'm not that angry. Just really sad.
What's funny is "Happy Without You" is my least favorite Annie track and yet it seems to be the song that most readily gets stuck in my head. I don't know why. It's happened with other tracks by other artists, songs I'm not crazy about either. Maybe I can think of some examples later.
I'm so sensitive now! Even something that isn't a direct diss hurts my feelings a bit! Somebody made a bit of a mocking comment about GBAs being made in pink and purple. I have a purple GBA
And I love it! So they're cussing something that I love If things weren't going on already I'd probably think nothing of it, but now everything is getting to me.
I forgot to say the story of my buying The Art of Happiness by Howard Cutler and the Dalai Lama. I discovered and joined the Nutrition and Diet group just today (or yesterday now), which is good because I really need advice on rehabbing my diet like I said. In one thread, Olivia recommended The Art of Happiness to another member, and I literally rushed right out almost straightaway and bought it. It's not often that I feel compelled to rush right out and buy something. Good thing I got it, too. At moments I feel like I'm dying inside. Maybe I should go back and read Jane Goodall's Reason for Hope. She was my first real hero I think, and is still pretty much the only one.
Although I told jonnytrrrash7 earlier that Annie is my hero for the Chewing Gum video alone. X-O Oh man. That is the height of seck-see right there. Sure wish I could shake my can like Annie... can. Seriously I am pretty in awe of girls that can dance good. And she dances REAL good. *melts*
Oh yeah and Mei is my hero for being as hairy as, if not hairer than, I am. EW GROSS huh? Seriously though, us super-hairy ladies need to stick together. We can comb each other's stomach hair and braid each other's pits, it'll be fun. Tune in for another "more than you wanted to know about CruxbaseAlpha" next time.
I just discovered that the word "manko" is Japanese for the vag. As if Manko wasn't cool enough already.
I really like the "mad" emoticon:
That little dude conveys what I'm feeling so well, so many times over. Thank you, mad guy.
I was thinking to start a thread about dreads. I'm curious as to what leads... well, white people, to get dreads. What significance does it hold for them? What about the people who do it just because they think it looks good?
I thought up something to say in case I have to defend Annie's honor on here some day:
"People, Annie's just a cute and sexy Norwegian lady who never hurt nobody nohow. All she's out to do is make good pop music. Sure, she doesn't have the best voice, and her lyrics are nothing special most of the time, but you don't need either of those to make great pop music, and that's what her music is. (to be continued)"
It needs to be finished but it starts off good. I kind of dissed her myself though, didn't I?
Well, I'm not always worshipping at Annie's feet though I might give the impression I am. Pobody's nerfect and neither is Annie. Besides, in trying to explain to the h8rs, it would make me look better if I make sure that I'm not just giving a purely glowing review of mah gurl. Not like those hatas will listen anyway, but whatevz As I thought this up in my head in the shower (seriously in my spare time I sit around and think up things to write in my journal... it's a sickness ) I also thought of a rant to say against all those -inducing people on the music board. It sounded pretty good in my head but I think it was basically exactly what I just said at the top of this entry. Dissin' without qualifyin' and such. Come on, people.
Meh. I think my Annie-defendin' speech would fall on deaf ears... and get dissed itself, of course. But I like describing Annie as a "cute and sexy Norwegian lady who never hurt nobody nohow". It makes me feel lurve in my heart. And that's what the world needs now. Love, sweet love. No, not just for some. But for everyonnnnnne.
I actually like Burt Bacharach too. Another window into the weird world of CruxbaseAlpha's musical tastes. If you see me walking down the street, and I start to cry each time we meet, walk on byyyyyyyy... The moment I wake up, before I put on my makeup, I say a little prayer for yooooooou. I think that is some good songwriting right there.
What Annie's official site needs are some cell phone wallpapers. Ringtones I can live without. I would like to see Annie every time I open my phone though. Hey I need to find an Annie desktop wallpaper. Good idea Carolyn. I'm glad you thought of that. In checking her official site for what must be the five millionth time this month, I saw the monthly giveaway thing and joined the official mailing list. Haven't received my confirmation email yet though. What's up like that.
HE WAS MY HONEY
HE WAS MY HONEY
HAPPY WITHOUT NO HONEY
I don't get why it gets stuck in my head so much, I really don't. And now the official site is offering limited edition 12"s of remixes of that song. Weird.
...
I'm tired and sad. I can't escape.
I haven't had to deal with a constant sadness that won't go away in a long time. I'm not sure how to deal with it. "It'll pass" as people say, but it's making me want to just shut down and stay under the covers for a few weeks now. That makes me sad, too, because only a couple days ago I was still able to stay fairly upbeat. I guess it hadn't hit me completely then. That sucks so bad.
Thank you guys for your kind words. I really really really appreciate your support.
Actually in Girls Only someone advised one of the ladies to "keep busy" to get through a rough time... I think that is exactly what I need to do. Since I wasn't busy to begin with I'll have to figure out how to get busy now. It will be hard since it's become so hard to function because of this. I worry that doing puzzles and playing my Gameboy might not cut the mustard. Maybe it'd be a good start though. And for gosh sakes I need to get over my feeling overwhelmed and get myself to clean my room. Cleaning my room is something I struggle with so much. It makes me crazy and freaked out and unhappy. But the chore might help take my mind off things, and I need to do it because my room is scary.
I wonder if canoeing season on the lake is closed. Or it might be good to do some artistic stuff... I wish I could paint. No supplies and don't really know where to start though. Drawing isn't really calming for me anymore. Though it might be neat if I could find a picture that conveys how I'm feeling and just draw it. Even if I never show it to anybody.
Hmm. It might be silly to think this about porn but maybe I should ask around if there is a photoset on here that makes someone feel better about life. Not all of them are just plain raunchy. I find lithium_picnic's sets have a calming effect on me sometimes because of the style and look of the photography, and the way the stories are told. And there are silly ones... Alexis' sets are pretty silly. I liked the toilet monster one
I think it's high time I ordered those sudoku books I have in my Amazon cart. Unfortunately it says they won't ship until August. wtf. I want them now. If I were to get one day shipping I'd have to pay an extra 25 bucks. That's too much :-\\ Well, at least I have the puzzles on that site I just liked to. But there's something calming about sitting in an armchair with a pencil and solving puzzles in a book. Darn.
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
and listen to lotsa of Bacharach
ps: Annie passes w/ flying colours!