linkismyhero

I keep thinking about my puppy, Link, in my copy of Nintendogs. One morning this week I woke up and was having some terrible (but irrational) anxieties that something bad would happen to him, like he would get bitten by another puppy or otherwise hurt (I'm pretty sure this can't actually happen in the game), or that I would neglect him inadvertently somehow. It made me pretty sad, but once I started feeling more awake and alert, the anxieties faded. I still worry that I will do something bad or wrong, though.

I gave him his first bath the other day. It was fun. I brushed him afterward and he was all sparkly-clean! (Or, as the game says, "sparklingly clean". That looks weird, to me, but I guess it's correct.) I was a little worried that I would get soap in his eyes. But all went well.

I have had to have him forget some of the tricks I've taught him, because he would confuse a command with something else (I taught him to chase his tail when I said "chase", but then he thought I was saying "chase" when I said "sit"). I saw someone in the Nintendo group give a tip to make sure your voice commands are multiple words and/or syllables, so it is easier for your puppy to learn and not get confused with other things.

I have had the "dog walking" song stuck in my head all day. The first time I took Link for a walk, he ate a bread crust off of the sidewalk. I didn't know to tug him away by the leash, so he just ate it. (I know it was a bread crust, because it listed it under "last thing eaten" on his info page.) On one of our walks today, he found a bubble blower! I already have one, but it was neat, because all of the things he's found on walks so far have been "junk" items that have no use in the game except to be sold for a little extra $$$. The bubble blower is cool; you blow bubbles by blowing into the microphone! Link is not that into the bubble blower, though. He likes his tennis ball more.

I have to update because I can't sleep, and I am hyper. See, I started a new medication tonight. I had tried it before, and actually had to stop because it tasted so terribly bitter. But at some point my psychiatrist recommended I use applesauce to help me swallow pills and avoid the bad taste. So I tried that tonight. But I think in the process, I forgot to take my regular medicines. One of them is an antipsychotic that helps me sleep, and, I guess, keeps me sane, although I really don't think I'm prone to psychosis anymore, but maybe I'm in denial about that. If I feel this crazy without it, then maybe I have actually gone insane and these pills are the only thing keeping me together. Argh! Stupid medicine. I wish I could live without it, but I'm afraid that I wouldn't be able to function. Stupid depression. Oh, listen to me! Whine whine whine, moan moan moan, waah waah waah! Well, look. I've been up for twenty-four hours. This never happens. Yesterday was my first day of class! I had to ride the awful bus and deal with a panic attack all day yesterday. I need sleep. I think I have a right to complain right now.

Combined with this scary hyperactivity is a feeling of total nausea and pain. I am really a mess. I am going to call my psychiatrist tomorrow and ask him about this. Tomorrow! TODAY!

Oh, I hate this! What stings is that when I am this hyper, I write good posts and comments, but when I'm back to normal, I return to dull stupidity. It's like that, too, with caffeine. I'm totally off caffeine at this point, so if I have any, I get hyper like this, and also start to think more quickly and cleverly. It's like the medications are dulling the real me! NIGHTMARE!

I have got to calm down. I took the antipsychotic, so hopefully that will start to work in a couple of hours and I'll calm down and sleep. I can't imagine that I took it and am feeling this way. I must have forgotten. This has happened before, and I can think of no other reason why I would be so freakishly hyper.

Medication is the pits!