I guess this journal entry is kind of morose. Glum, even. I don't really want to spred teh negativity, so after the glum part I'll be more upbeat, I promise.
I don't really think of myself as a particularly interesting or fascinating person, but people have told me they think I am. I see people here on SG who truly fascinate me, and I think to myself that I'm just not in the same league. I don't see what's so interesting about me. Maybe it's just that, being me, I can't surprise myself.
I have so few interests, and I see people like MollyMolly, whose interests are so wide and varied that I don't think there'd be room in my brain to fit in all of that information. And I lack passion. Molly tells me I shouldn't worry so much about it, but it's so rare that I get truly excited about anything. If you've been reading my journal for a while, you know how excited I was about Annie, but even that has waned.
I feel like I don't have many things that make me love life. I am envious of others who are so passionate about things that they're bursting with energy and happiness. I know I'm not the only one, and perhaps it is in fact somewhat rare to find someone so passionate.
I just wish I could find things that make me happy to be alive, things that take me outside of myself, things that thrill and amaze me. I don't know what I'd need to do or change in myself to become a passionate person. My mom tells me she has the same problem. Maybe it's just the personality I was born with.
Okay, with that all out of the way, it's time for some cheering up! I went to an SGDC meet-up a couple of months ago at like a Mediterranean caf. They were selling some pretty weird, off-the-wall drinks (of the non-alcoholic variety). I was brave and tried (get this) litchi juice with aloe vera. (Litchi, a.k.a. lychee, is this wacky sort of fruit that I've never actually seen in its pure form. Read about it on Wikipedia.) The aloe vera was in the form of these long, pulpy strands. Aloe vera is heralded for its soothing properties, and it was in fact soothing to ingest. It didn't have much flavor at all; the super-sweet litchi juice made up for that.
Speaking of wacky fruits, have you ever heard of durians??? Apparently, the smell of a durian is so utterly foul that these things are actually banned in public places like airports and busses. But it is said they taste absolutely delicious, with a delectable custardy texture. I stumbled on a plain text file, years ago, about the awful foods of the world, and the entry on durians was by far the longest. I've been in awe of the stinky things ever since. I've never been near one, and from the sound of things, I really don't want to. I was kind of surprised that Super Mario Sunshine has durians in it, but doesn't mention how stinky they are. Check Wikipedia for more info. (Can you tell I'm a fan of Wikipedia? Annie's article is pretty much all my work.)
Mom's birthday was the 16th. I think she's 48 now. I didn't get her anything. :-/ Generally, mom and I don't seem to get things for each other for our birthdays, but last year we got each other Palm computer things. I should have gotten her something. I still can, I guess. I mean, I did wish her a happy birthday a bunch of times throughout the day. I'm not sure what to get her.
Well, duh, it should be some Morrissey thing, I guess. I'm not sure what I could get her that she doesn't already have, though. I'll have to look around. Maybe I could get her a Moz LP, and bring out my turntable and have her listen to it out there. That might be cool.
Well, at this point I'm sort of rambling and not saying much, so I'll wrap it up. Have a nice weekend, y'all.
I don't really think of myself as a particularly interesting or fascinating person, but people have told me they think I am. I see people here on SG who truly fascinate me, and I think to myself that I'm just not in the same league. I don't see what's so interesting about me. Maybe it's just that, being me, I can't surprise myself.
I have so few interests, and I see people like MollyMolly, whose interests are so wide and varied that I don't think there'd be room in my brain to fit in all of that information. And I lack passion. Molly tells me I shouldn't worry so much about it, but it's so rare that I get truly excited about anything. If you've been reading my journal for a while, you know how excited I was about Annie, but even that has waned.
I feel like I don't have many things that make me love life. I am envious of others who are so passionate about things that they're bursting with energy and happiness. I know I'm not the only one, and perhaps it is in fact somewhat rare to find someone so passionate.
I just wish I could find things that make me happy to be alive, things that take me outside of myself, things that thrill and amaze me. I don't know what I'd need to do or change in myself to become a passionate person. My mom tells me she has the same problem. Maybe it's just the personality I was born with.
Okay, with that all out of the way, it's time for some cheering up! I went to an SGDC meet-up a couple of months ago at like a Mediterranean caf. They were selling some pretty weird, off-the-wall drinks (of the non-alcoholic variety). I was brave and tried (get this) litchi juice with aloe vera. (Litchi, a.k.a. lychee, is this wacky sort of fruit that I've never actually seen in its pure form. Read about it on Wikipedia.) The aloe vera was in the form of these long, pulpy strands. Aloe vera is heralded for its soothing properties, and it was in fact soothing to ingest. It didn't have much flavor at all; the super-sweet litchi juice made up for that.
Speaking of wacky fruits, have you ever heard of durians??? Apparently, the smell of a durian is so utterly foul that these things are actually banned in public places like airports and busses. But it is said they taste absolutely delicious, with a delectable custardy texture. I stumbled on a plain text file, years ago, about the awful foods of the world, and the entry on durians was by far the longest. I've been in awe of the stinky things ever since. I've never been near one, and from the sound of things, I really don't want to. I was kind of surprised that Super Mario Sunshine has durians in it, but doesn't mention how stinky they are. Check Wikipedia for more info. (Can you tell I'm a fan of Wikipedia? Annie's article is pretty much all my work.)
Mom's birthday was the 16th. I think she's 48 now. I didn't get her anything. :-/ Generally, mom and I don't seem to get things for each other for our birthdays, but last year we got each other Palm computer things. I should have gotten her something. I still can, I guess. I mean, I did wish her a happy birthday a bunch of times throughout the day. I'm not sure what to get her.
Well, duh, it should be some Morrissey thing, I guess. I'm not sure what I could get her that she doesn't already have, though. I'll have to look around. Maybe I could get her a Moz LP, and bring out my turntable and have her listen to it out there. That might be cool.
Well, at this point I'm sort of rambling and not saying much, so I'll wrap it up. Have a nice weekend, y'all.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
I saw unusual fruits on Letterman once like 20 years ago. He ate something spiky (but I don't think it was durian; different shape, different spikes, more rounded) from Africa and said it was gross.
I think you have a crisp and clear cut way of looking at the world around you, maybe that's what people admire about you.