lily

I've been doing really well at the stripper Job, I dance to really fucked up music on stage. This one girl that works there, who thinks she's like god or something in the stripping industry is such a bitch to me. She looks like a truck stop stripper, The epitomie of white trash, with the heart and rose 80's looking tattoos and all. She's real jealous of me cause i've been making the most money the past few nights. I want her to fall on stage and break her neck, She's so incredibly mean to me. She's always bossing me around like she knows something when really i could be teaching her a thing or two because i make a hell of alot more money than her. she's so fuckin condescening. I just smile at her at the end of the night when she's counting her 20 dollars that she made. ha, bitch. It really doesn't make for a positive working environment but i guess that's incredibly too idealistic. "Life is shit! Suck it up you fucking rockstar, You're going to be dead in ten years if you keep living the way you fuckin live" Bill says to me and then he'll go on ranting about the police department and government agencies and how they plot to lock him in institutions because he knows all this "Information". Me and my mentally ill older friend. We're like some twisted version of harold and maude. Still sleeping on his floor. I come home from work at 4 in the morning and he's furiously writing his book, He's so insane, some hunter s. thompson. I love him. I'm looking for a place to rent though although i love how theatrical bill is when he tells me his stories, I'm going to miss him. It's going to be weird to stay somewhere for a few months, I need to get my shit together for a while though. I just hate the zombie like routine of going to work and paying rent, I'm an adventure girl bill says. That's why i'm a nomad and I can't work a conventional job or have conventional friends. I get itchy feet to travel still even though i've only been staying in one place for a few weeks. I'm a gypsy, It's in my fuckin blood. I love waking up in different towns and cities every week and exposing my thumbs to the open roads. It'll be good to stay somewhere for a few months though, be a little productive before i go back on the road. I've been doing alot of art which is good. Been fascinated by Joan Of Arc, Reading anything i can about her. She's been inspiring most of my art lately and i dream about her alot. Covered myself in paint and bodyslammed the walls, I told bill that i don't need therapy, I believe in Catharsis.
Love, Lily