Ok, so I'm back in England for a week, partly to attend to a few practical issues (picking up new laptop, buying clothes roughly my size, etc...) and also to take a break from the chaos which is my life in Sweden and sort my head out a bit.
Tonight I attended my first social function since I returned- the mighty Gin Panic rocking the Garage. Aside from the odd arrogant guitarist and a bit of soulless riffage from some of the support bands, it was a good evening- twas nice to meet up with "Mistress Pearl" and other familiar faces, having been away for a few months. I'm glad to say that GP were everything I'd hoped for and the ringing in my ears is a pleasant reminder of a short but inspiring set.
The stuff with Annie worked out indifferently, which is better than it could have been, I suppose. She doesn't want to start anything, 'cos I'm in the wrong country, which only inspires me more to ditch the shit in Sweden and move back to England. She also refused to meet up with me until she knew that I only wanted to be friends, which I can't honestly say I do, so it's a bit of a mess. Out of all of the whole fiasco I've become pretty sure that it wouldn't work for long- if at all- if we did get together, but it's kinda strange and hard letting go of a girl I've been interested in for about 5 years.
I'm amused and intrigued by my willingness to entirely ditch my future plans for the sake of a girlfriend- I don't know what it means; it's kinda romantic but quite stupid too. I guess it shows how much I enjoy being with someone... perhaps because I actually spend so little time in that state.
Tonight I attended my first social function since I returned- the mighty Gin Panic rocking the Garage. Aside from the odd arrogant guitarist and a bit of soulless riffage from some of the support bands, it was a good evening- twas nice to meet up with "Mistress Pearl" and other familiar faces, having been away for a few months. I'm glad to say that GP were everything I'd hoped for and the ringing in my ears is a pleasant reminder of a short but inspiring set.
The stuff with Annie worked out indifferently, which is better than it could have been, I suppose. She doesn't want to start anything, 'cos I'm in the wrong country, which only inspires me more to ditch the shit in Sweden and move back to England. She also refused to meet up with me until she knew that I only wanted to be friends, which I can't honestly say I do, so it's a bit of a mess. Out of all of the whole fiasco I've become pretty sure that it wouldn't work for long- if at all- if we did get together, but it's kinda strange and hard letting go of a girl I've been interested in for about 5 years.
I'm amused and intrigued by my willingness to entirely ditch my future plans for the sake of a girlfriend- I don't know what it means; it's kinda romantic but quite stupid too. I guess it shows how much I enjoy being with someone... perhaps because I actually spend so little time in that state.
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i have to agree with Pearlbass on this one. i definitely wouldn't ditch Sweden for a girlfriend, unless ditching Sweden looks like it's going to happen anyway (and you haven't got a lot to lose in the long run). i guess you've been there a couple of months now, but the first few months are always the toughest.
that said, i've been in a similar situation myself. when i was a first year undergraduate, i was having an internet relationship with an Australian. the distance of it drove me crazy, and so when she decided to come over, i took a gap year between my first and second year. we travelled europe together, and while it worked out in a way, it actually turned out that we kind of went against each other's grain (if you know what i mean). so if any bigger sacrifices had been made, i really would have regretted it now. (still, trying telling me at the time
Trust your instincts, is all I can say really.
good luck for when you head back to Sweden
It is hard to let go sometimes but it's probally better in the long run.