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lambda

Outer Space

Member Since 2005

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Monday May 08, 2006

May 8, 2006
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Experiencing excessive frustration today; need a really long walk; finished pynchon's V., no longer have an obsessive distraction; reading the paper and smoking cigarettes is no substitute; coffee doesn't seem to help either; finally did taxes today in preparation for FAFSA, accompanied by fear and self-doubt; last week's adrenaline-rush of school has evaporated, leaving in its wake a sickly-weak feeling, and an inability to concentrate; relationships with flesh-and-blood people including but not limited to the romantic/somatic prove, as usual, complicated and unnerving; obsessed with the diamond bordered by the front hip bones, belly button, and top of pubic bone; sun is bright enough to burn, so I sleep past noon.
anderswolleck:
my journal rules
May 8, 2006
pastura:
that was a particularly lovely piece of depression. especially the part about your new obsession - though i'm guessing it's really an old-as-time obsession. i'm a fan of that particular geometry as well, and there are so many forms it can take. i'm finding myself just kind of wishing i could gaze at a world of them and have that be just perfectly normal. just gazing. i like to gaze. i kind of just want to melt into that.

i'm sorry i hadn't written back yet, but i planned to... maybe i'll do that now instead of finishing up here....
May 9, 2006

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