laine666

I swear I didn't read yours before I wrote mine... What remains is raw and new and hurts like a bastard. It's alive, though...

what can you do to break out of the wet wool blanket that covers and takes? You need to drink half a pot of GI coffee and start writing and writing. Try it!

I am north of you (28 degrees and snow on the ground)! Glad you had a good weekend. Wish everything could be more cut-and-dry for you! It's so damn confusing when your with him and all is lovely and you KNOW that it's good and what he feels, and then you leave and everything is lost all over again, and you KNOW he feels nothing and doesn't miss you and is looking for someone else... Kisses my love.

Your self loathing would be justified if we all loathed you, yes. We don't (at least I don't). Gets better, buddy. Have fun tonight!

poooooooooo...
show= tonic, friday... neat. show up or die.
i am dead.

been there, done that....Therapy is like that, it takes time for the relationship with the therapist to kick in and the all- so-mighty transfer to start operate. but it does work, it's just a long process.

there's nothing wrong with being down and depressed AND taking action against it. so courage lady !

tlc

drunken sarah thursday.

We need, your friends I mean. We want to know lainey is okay, that she is doing either the right thing or the dodgy thing, that she knows her pals are here in this space, not as good as being on the same couch but theoretically the same. Empathetic, curious, wondering and hoping that the walls aren't caving in too hard and too fast.

Give a shout!

Don't worry about meds. Sometimes they are the best thing going. I'd still be taking the first antidepressant I was ever prescribed were it not for an especially unbearable side effect. It absolutely tighted up my thinking and sense of hope, even made me more outgoing and assertive. Anyway, you know where to get me if you want to talk at length on this. You will be fine, even if it doesn't feel like that's possible.

you will never lose me, my dear sweet girl. i love you more than you know, and i will always be here for you... even if i move somewhere far away.

You are far more disciplined than I am. Given the circumstances, I, well, you know... Good on ya, mate!

nicely done, then!

so its official... im moving. tomorrow. today is going to be crazy.

thanks so much for finding that site for me. i got a job!!! (got the offer letter today) i may be a low-wage-slave but hey a job is a job and it's a damn good start. I think i found an apartment too- in beaverton... its very cute. i find out if i get it on friday. *crosses fingers*

so far so good.... i've only been living in oregon less than 20 days.

hey, we might actually get to meet. what a concept.

he's an ass... he has lots of explaining to do if he wants to redeem himself. yup.

Cool, so I should come up for the show? Probably would fly b'c car not so good for long distances. And then what are you doing about NY? I think there's a show in Eugene, too, but dammit, they took them off the site!!

still lovin that site, thanks.

My grandfather would say that

Someone: "Where ya goin'?"
My Grandfahter: "Crazy! Wanna come?"

I dig Christian Bale too. Well, not that way. He's a fuckin' GREAT actor. I'm so glad he's gonna be in the next Batman flick, and that that idiot Joel Schumacher is NOT directing it!

Buck up, buddy. You are a doll and you can write your ass off! It will happen, somehow, someway. I need to tell myself this as well... Try not to ruminate. Writing it down helps, no?

Whoa! Ever think about visiting Pittsburgh? (Wink wink, nudge nudge).

NYC is very cool, one of the only places that lives up to the legends and even the chiches. My favorite part about being there with my old band was walking around with an open 40 in front of a cop and not having him bat an eye... I suppose I am easily amused by simple things...