I am no stranger to depression. I have had bouts of depression on & off (mostly on) my whole life & it really took me until age 34 to figure out what I need (for me at least) to get through such times... it is something I can snap out of, but not TOTALLY snap out of. It is hard to explain.
It is a confusing feeling & it is a neccessary process for the mind & body to take a break. We all experience it, but those of us who are more sensitive to everything experience it deeper & it is more of a disfunction then the natural process it is suppose to be.
I find that not fighting it & not judging myself for feeling depressed helps alot. I just say "So what? I am depressed. So be it." I like to just "be" with my depression, not judging, not complaining, not trying to munipulate it or change it... I just let it do it's thing... & then it does it's thing & everything is ok again. It is a natural process. It is how you think of it that becomes like a disease. And hormomones & chemical imbalances can be involved too, I do know that too.
And don't think a pill can fix it... it can NOT. After 18 years of trying, I know it is just a money making business & although it seems to help, it only does temporarily. If anything, all those anti-depressents & SSRI's did was stunt my emotional growth & make me a robot of a person for those years. I hate thinking back to those years. What a waste.
Funny. Emotionally I am feeling great for a change & it just seems like everyone else is down. The universe evens itself out in strange ways I suppose.
It is a confusing feeling & it is a neccessary process for the mind & body to take a break. We all experience it, but those of us who are more sensitive to everything experience it deeper & it is more of a disfunction then the natural process it is suppose to be.
I find that not fighting it & not judging myself for feeling depressed helps alot. I just say "So what? I am depressed. So be it." I like to just "be" with my depression, not judging, not complaining, not trying to munipulate it or change it... I just let it do it's thing... & then it does it's thing & everything is ok again. It is a natural process. It is how you think of it that becomes like a disease. And hormomones & chemical imbalances can be involved too, I do know that too.
And don't think a pill can fix it... it can NOT. After 18 years of trying, I know it is just a money making business & although it seems to help, it only does temporarily. If anything, all those anti-depressents & SSRI's did was stunt my emotional growth & make me a robot of a person for those years. I hate thinking back to those years. What a waste.
Funny. Emotionally I am feeling great for a change & it just seems like everyone else is down. The universe evens itself out in strange ways I suppose.
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suicidal_george:
I was thinking the other day that depakote is the reason why our stomaches are fucked up. So an other minus for pills. I tend to deal with my moods by pushing them harder. It's kind of like deliberately tripping yourself whenever you start to lose your balance, but i have a theory that you can turn a negative into a positive if you push it hard enough.
suicidal_george:
ps - sign up for the halloween party already. oh, and come to PDX and eat some sushi with me.