koolthing

I don't sleep much.
Never could, even when I was a kid.
I would make a tent out of the sheets and read until morning, drinking cranberry juice or sunny delight out of the hospital IV bags I had stashed under my bed - the long plastic tubing snaking around my body, slurp slurp all night long. I read everything, fantasy, science fiction, encyclopedias, medical books, whatever was around.

Now I just lie there and think.
Most of the time I think about her.
Her eyes used to make me unable to move.
I couldn't think, I couldn't breathe. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't.
I think about how she moves when she is dancing, how her body felt when my hands caressed her waist and her eyes had me frozen in place.
Sometimes I cry, but that doesn't happen as much anymore.
I am beginning to learn how to feel again, and the writing helps.
It helps to learn how to feel, to confront the demons and the distress.

Ummm....

I was planning on spending some time writing today, but I have to go be inspirational and happy - at least for the duration

;-)