2018

25

I've never really thought about how last year affected my life.

Yes, I'm still struggling with my disabilities (mental illnesses and my physical conditions) and it's still hard, so I'm often thinking about how much I need to do and how much help I need.

But I need to be thankful for all the steps I was able to do for my recovery, even though I'll always be affected in some ways.

In the beginning of 2018 I started therapy. It was super scary to search for another therapist and to give it another chance after so many attempts, but I'm glad that I found her. She is an angel and she really helps me find out who I am, why I am this way and to accept how I was born.

My self-harm has decreased drastically. There were only 3 relapses and one hospitalization, it sounds like much, but it's so mch better than the years before.

In April, I had my near death experience and it was excrutiating, but I've learned how to grow from it and how to stand up and go on with my life.

Also, I've decided to see my problems in other ways and that I want to help others to not make the mistakes I've made, so I've started my social work studies, which really makes me more than happy and I think that it's the right thing for me.

Recovery is hard. But 2018 proved, that I can do this! Everybody can do it. No matter how much pain it comes with, it will be okay in the end.

VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
yaoth:
Proud of what you have accomplished so far. You go girl!
elixic:
So glad to hear you're coping well and looking forward to living life! I do hope you can remember what makes you believe things are ok when you are not feeling like they are in the future, though I know it's hard. A book that changed the way I think about depression and mental illness a while back was Furiously Happy by Jenny Lawson, maybe you've already read it? If not I highly recommend it, she's got a great sense of humor about her condition, and sheds like on the way people stigmatize mental health and how we approach it. I was honestly laughing so hard during parts of her books when she tells her stories that I was crying, everyone should read it, even if they don't struggle themselves. After I read that book, I read the book How Emotions are Made by Lisa Barrett, it gives great insight into what happens in our bodies that gives rise to emotions, and how we can better pay attention to how we feel. They are also both available as audio books. I'm not sure if they are available in any language other than english, but if you are looking for something to read or listen to and have not checked those out, they are both very good.

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