koleeta

everyday that passes i think "today. it could be today that he gives up. it could be today that i drop out of his mind forever." and as the days pass the chances of this happening become greater and greater.

i've never been so afraid to call him. i am so scared. so much so that i have been putting it off day after day. i fear the words i will hear once his voice is on the other end of the line. in this situation, it is better for me to always wonder than to know everything. so i don't call him. i know better. i know myself, finally.

but i miss him. i miss my friend. i miss my lover.