kittykitty

The following is an excerpt from a children's book "Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants" by Dave Pilkey. The evil professor forces everyone to assume new names....

Here's how the new names are determined:

Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name

> a= poopsie b = lumpy
> c = buttercup d = gadget
> e = crusty f = greasy
> g = fluffy h = cheeseball
> i = chim-chim j = stinky
> k = flunky l = boobie
> m = pinky n = zippy
> o = goober p = doofus
> q = slimy r = loopy
> s = snotty t = tootie
> u = dorkey v = squeezit
> w = oprah x = skipper
> y = dinky z = zsa-zsa

Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name

> a = apple b = toilet
> c = giggle d = burger
> e = girdle f = barf
> g = lizard h = waffle
> i = cootie j = monkey
> k = potty l = liver
> m = banana n = rhino
> o = bubble p = hamster
> q = toad r = gizzard
> s = pizza t = gerbil
> u = chicken v = pickle
> w = chuckle x = tofu
> y = gorilla z = stinker

Use the fourth letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name

> a = head b = mouth
> c = face d = nose
> e = tush f = breath
> g = pants h = shorts
> i = lips j = honker
> k = butt l = brain
> m = tushie n = chunks
> o = hiney p = biscuits
> q = toes r = buns
> s = fanny t = sniffer
> u = sprinkles v = kisser
> w = squirt x = humperdinck
> y = brains z = juice