killedwithkarate

I am such a huge dork. I get all maudlin because of musical theatre. And not even classic musical theatre, new and fairly unheard of musical theatre. I've been singing "I'm Not Afraid of Anything" from Songs for a New World (Jason Robert Brown... I am SUCH a nerd!) and it's the type of song that makes me sure that I don't ever want to completely abandon contemporary music. Also, if I was a guy/had a male duet partner, I would definitely sing "The Kid Inside" from "Is There Life After High School" (by Craig Carnelia of "Working" fame.) I think I've been brain washed from my four years in a musical theatre program, but I'm not sure whether the lyrics are actually good, or if they're just poignant and held together with heart-wrenching chords. ("I can feel my hand, my trembling hand, on Michelle's Angora Sweater/ I can hear my band, that awful band, only now it sounds much better...") Yeah. I never said I was cool.

I don't really have too much to say. I'm reading "The Satanic Verses" and I'm finding it quite interesting. I want to take baroque dance lessons again, and not just because of those cool shoes. As soon as I get through the next month or so of auditions, I'm going to take a few dance classes a week. I miss it so much. I'd really like to get into a dance company again... But I need to get into working shape for that to happen again. Once-three times a week is not enough, especially considering the level that I should be at.

I have this feeling lately like I want to cry because I'm so happy, and I don't know what I did to deserve this feeling except for the sneeking suspicion that it has something to do with the return of old friends into my life. I want to go to New York or sit in a grassy outstretch in Etobicoke. I want spring to come, because I'm in a floaty skirt and sandal kind of mood. I love snow, don't get me wrong, but the sky is a bit opressive after a while. I just want pretty blue skies and to get my garden back.

I wish I could be cool and write about my passionately unpassionate past, but I don't have one, so I'm left talking about the dorkiest things in the world and using adjectives like pretty and blue. I'm never exactly on time with anything. Maybe I'll catch up to the people in my life eventually.

"I don't know why people run. I don't know why things fall through. I don't know how anybody survives in this life without someone like you." (The Last Five Years)