joseflovesyou

I've been feeling sort of weird, kind of, a little bit, I think. Interesting.

I think jello would be the stupidest thing to be addicted to.

Feeling knocked out, feeling too sexy for my motherfucking self, gotta find my bitch and fuck her ass to death. I feel so zigidy zigidy zigidy, 'cause I'm floating in ecstasy.

Goddammit Otto, you have Herpes, err, uhh... I mean Lupus

This is the type of shit I try to avoid...

I started to write that sentence with the intent of reveling something I would normally never talk about, got to that point, and realized I'd rather keep these things where they've always been. I'm not going to be one of those people.

I just wish I was dead.

Tell me everything you know about popcorn.

I hate my life.

f1

Tell me, Benny Hanna, do you believe in lord god, jesus christ, king of wild knife throwing cookers? I'm sad, and I have allergies, but when I hold this creepy plastic doll... I feel like I could watch 2 girls 1 cup all day O L I D R N E vibrating is a very dangerous side effect of pregnancy. Which is weird, because pregnancy...
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When I grow up, I'm going to be Bill Murray.

Unemployment says I owe THEM $3,000. I might as well shoot myself in the face now.

My friend gave me a drink, said: "The pillars of alcohol." It can not be used as one of the pillars of alcohol, because it helps me to walk with a cane. I carefully sew drinks. Instead of the rod, the step is not the case

Anyone want to come fuck in the tub?

Look at these shoes. They're fucking functional. Highly functional in fact. You'd expect shoes to go on your feet, otherwise what's the point, but sometimes there is a surprise, sometimes you get so much more, I mean... just look at these shoes. Do you understand? These fucking shoes man, it's about these shoes.

On second thought, the shoes aren't the issue here.

On third thought,...
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