joleigh

fin
Washed away layers
of filth, grease, beer, food
wafting smells spin round and I can't scrub hard enough


my skin is giving...
I didn't even realize
the crimson taints the rest of the water
I didn't even notice
peeling layers after layers
and I can't stop
its dripping now and
the water turns red
____________________________

I thought about it today, it being all that is was and will be. Well I came to see that at one point only 3 months past. I was put into a position where it was all or nothing.... for 10 days time, and I was ready and willing to put my everything every ounce of anything I had left into whatever the hopes were of making... I want that. I have never in my life felt so passionate about anything before. As layers came off in the shower I thought to myself today... "I would have died a happy lady right then and there" and I can honestly say I was willing to push it to any level I didn't care. I want that kind of motivation back.
I am finding a new kind of motivation, but its just to live.... which isn't a bad thing, just there and then I had the motivation to give and give until death.... its was priceless and the more I think about it the more I want it back. This new motivation is just to get there...

It felt so good to care about absolutely NOTHING
I want that back... I want to give and give and give and not care at all and then give some more... when I am exhausted and tired and sore I want to do it again the next day and the next...

It made me grow... and understand that its not worth the fight, and good times are more important then anything. You can't put value on that, so I won't try to I will just keep it going, moving, drinking, singing, dancing, and keep living because that is honestly when I have the most fun. Why not live





Oh and BTW

mos t amazing lady ever!!!!
EVER!!!
I would do her so hard...
yes I am talking about
Elly
and that new BW set of hers that kinda makes me wanna RAWR!!!


could this lady be any more perfect...







set here