jjay

Were all born into this river without knowing how to swim
And eventually we learn how to keep this water under our chin
Some times this river is so cold to be in
Freezing my soul, solidifying my skin
Regardless of how far I see, I never see my travels in
Were carried by the current, being driven by the wind
The scenery we pass,...
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I don't want to study!!!!!!!!!!

So anyway.........who reads this crap? Yeah thats what I thought. Ok so tonight was typical. An evening at home with friends playing video games relaxing. Just an ordinary night. Talking and laughing....it's good to be able to do both. Although I love my current friends I feel I need more. Some part of me just feels empty...it's a terrible feeling really, feeling empty. I need...
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It fell off today
Fell into a puddle
I just stared at It
Wondering why it was so important
Is that what makes me, me?
A rusted apendage filled with desire
Is that what makes me like them?
Blind and arogant
Cold and selfish
It's useless really
More of a burden than a blessing
A free ride
But to where?
Does this give me control...
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Woke up took a shower than went back to bed. I need motivation, drive, purpose, whatever you want to call it. Any suggestions? I haven't always been like this, I used to care. This chronic apathy is hard to kick. One of those great underacheivers that sits and waits as life hits them in the forehead. Waits for something to change. I think I'm bored...
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Lonliness......this feeling has erupted in my life. It's not a "I wish I had a girl" lonly, it is bigger than that. A girl would just patch up the hole. We have to walk down the path of life alone., no help from anyone. It's a very lonly world. You can attempt to gain relationships with people thinking they'll be there for you but over...
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I'm off! Off on a magical journey to nowhere, Where everybody knows my name and feelings are all the same. I'm going home for Thanksgiving, whew hooo!!!! Gettting out of this place! Anyways to anyone that cares or reads this garbage I call a journal, HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!! Be American and stuff yourself untill your incompacitated and rolling on the ground in pain. If you miss...
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I was at school today, sitting in the middle of campus just people watching. I do that alot. Just sit there and observe with my headphones on. Recently I've been writtng my thoughts down, well the coherent ones at least. I dunno I think I'm getting better at expressing myself. I like to write. I do it for myself not for anyone else and that...
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Love is fear in disguise

We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it *song fades*
Well Mr. Billy Joel, who did than? Hmmmmmmm......answer me that! And as long as your going to answer that one tell me this, what fire are we talking about anyway? It must be...
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So last night was interesting. I decided I was going to get faded and x rated. I've been feelin like losing control latly, one of those I don't give a fuck attitudes. I started early like 2 or 3 with some green smoke. I got nice and retarded and came up with the genuis idea to put on a nicotine patch even though I've never...
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Four days and I get to go home! I really need to get away from this place right now. Shit has just piled up here, I can't even begin to see over it. Going home will be good, a sort of rejuvenation. It will help me deal with my life here...I hope. It's good to see old friends and family. I miss them. I know...
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