I'm getting married in less than 3 months. And I'm confused about what that means for us.
Ray and I have always said that we would love to experiment with a 3some. I've done it before but not with him. And I also keep finding myself so turned on by the thought of being with women again.
Even though I'm very open-minded about some things (sex, politics, etc) there are some things I'm VERY traditional about, marriage is included in that.
Ray and I have a very strong relationship. We love and trust one another endlessly. Ray has helped me try to pick up girls before and encouraged me to explore that side of my sexuality. As long as I don't lie to him about it, he doesn't mind if I play with girls. And I would love to give him a 3some with some hot girl who fits his body type more than I do. (I'm voluptuous with big boobs but a tiny butt. He prefers athletic girls with like a b cup and a round ass.)
So here's my problem: I'm okay with our relationship the way it is, but I have always thought if we continued this way after being married that it would violate the sanctity of marriage. I know, I'm old fashioned, but I really need a marriage to be stable and between only 2 people who love each other to no end. However, with the wedding quickly approaching, it makes me nervous that I won't be able to give Ray that 3some that I want to. That makes me very sad. He has been so phenomonal with everything, and I know I'm not an easy person to live with (make that an impossible person to live with), full of irrational and unreasonable demands. I think he deserves something special. I also worry that once we've settled into married life our sex life may dwindle like other people's have. We've been together for just shy of 4 years and we still fuck 5 times a week on average. I know that's not typical, and I like that. I've never been bored before, but what if we do get bored once the possibility of other girls is off the table? Would it be ok to still have a 3some after being married? Doesn't that ruin the commitment of marriage? Or does it fall under doing whatever necessary to please your spouse and ensure a happy marriage?
My other thought was that it would still be ok until we had a child. I think it would be irresponsible to raise a child in an environment that is uncommitted. But there are people who raise children in polygamus marriages all the time and the kids turn out fine with a knowledge of how to safely get what you want sexually. I just don't know what I believe anymore. And that scares me.
Any advice or thoughts on the topic?
Ray and I have always said that we would love to experiment with a 3some. I've done it before but not with him. And I also keep finding myself so turned on by the thought of being with women again.
Even though I'm very open-minded about some things (sex, politics, etc) there are some things I'm VERY traditional about, marriage is included in that.
Ray and I have a very strong relationship. We love and trust one another endlessly. Ray has helped me try to pick up girls before and encouraged me to explore that side of my sexuality. As long as I don't lie to him about it, he doesn't mind if I play with girls. And I would love to give him a 3some with some hot girl who fits his body type more than I do. (I'm voluptuous with big boobs but a tiny butt. He prefers athletic girls with like a b cup and a round ass.)
So here's my problem: I'm okay with our relationship the way it is, but I have always thought if we continued this way after being married that it would violate the sanctity of marriage. I know, I'm old fashioned, but I really need a marriage to be stable and between only 2 people who love each other to no end. However, with the wedding quickly approaching, it makes me nervous that I won't be able to give Ray that 3some that I want to. That makes me very sad. He has been so phenomonal with everything, and I know I'm not an easy person to live with (make that an impossible person to live with), full of irrational and unreasonable demands. I think he deserves something special. I also worry that once we've settled into married life our sex life may dwindle like other people's have. We've been together for just shy of 4 years and we still fuck 5 times a week on average. I know that's not typical, and I like that. I've never been bored before, but what if we do get bored once the possibility of other girls is off the table? Would it be ok to still have a 3some after being married? Doesn't that ruin the commitment of marriage? Or does it fall under doing whatever necessary to please your spouse and ensure a happy marriage?
My other thought was that it would still be ok until we had a child. I think it would be irresponsible to raise a child in an environment that is uncommitted. But there are people who raise children in polygamus marriages all the time and the kids turn out fine with a knowledge of how to safely get what you want sexually. I just don't know what I believe anymore. And that scares me.
Any advice or thoughts on the topic?
In any case, I think its something that you and your guy should talk and talk honestly about. It would be really bad to suffocate your sex life together in the name of fidelity. On the other hand, you should both be truly comfortable with whatever way you choose to approach it. It is a long and interesting journey.