Here's some spewage of random thoughts and rants... I need to cut my hippie lookin hair. I should stop being a pussy and go out and skate... Im not gonna get better staring at the fuckin thing. I feel like watching "Belly" everyday like I use to do, gotta love DMX and the jamaican guy. In my opinion Seattle is alot more my style than Portland, Im not so sure about living here for a long time. I need a faster pace of life. More income, more experiences, more traveling, just basicly more. I want to do more of everything. Im in a weird mood lately. Im wanting and wishing alot. I keep thinking of that saying "wish in one hand, shit in the other and see which one gets fuller". I feel like Im trying and waiting for shit to happen, but it's just not happening. It's like trying to swim but you're just gasping for air cuz a fucking weight is dragging you under. Im ready for that weight to be cut the fuck off and start swimming like crazy. Im hungry for it.
I think my girl and I deserve it, and it needs to start happening. I could fill a book bitching about everything that Im pissed off about and think sucks ass, but I'd rather redirect all that frustration and turn it into more motivation. Am I living the life Im suppose to be living? Could it be that I just wont accept my fate? Could it be that too many people are raised believing that they deserve success and to reach some kind of greatness in which they will most likely never accomplish? Am I one of those people? Is the picture of how I believe my life should be, only a pipe dream and in need of a reality check? Was my grandfather right when he said that I was destined for greatness, or is that just what you tell kids at that age? Well, I guess only time will tell. What do I not want to become? A middle age man who does security for a living, whom everyone said had alot of potential to do more, and has a life of regrets and hardluck stories=aka=my father. I have tons of similarities as the man, hardly know the man, sure as hell hope I dont turn into the man. Sorry to anyone who reads this shit. Basicly this was what was on my mind, not thinking about anyone reading it. Whatever.
I think my girl and I deserve it, and it needs to start happening. I could fill a book bitching about everything that Im pissed off about and think sucks ass, but I'd rather redirect all that frustration and turn it into more motivation. Am I living the life Im suppose to be living? Could it be that I just wont accept my fate? Could it be that too many people are raised believing that they deserve success and to reach some kind of greatness in which they will most likely never accomplish? Am I one of those people? Is the picture of how I believe my life should be, only a pipe dream and in need of a reality check? Was my grandfather right when he said that I was destined for greatness, or is that just what you tell kids at that age? Well, I guess only time will tell. What do I not want to become? A middle age man who does security for a living, whom everyone said had alot of potential to do more, and has a life of regrets and hardluck stories=aka=my father. I have tons of similarities as the man, hardly know the man, sure as hell hope I dont turn into the man. Sorry to anyone who reads this shit. Basicly this was what was on my mind, not thinking about anyone reading it. Whatever.
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I had a good interview today for a non-Starbucks barista job, and it's 40+hrs/week, so hopefully I won't have to worry about finding a job much longer. Of course, it means I'll have far less time to waste on the internet, which will blow.