jcup

I have found motivation to get shit done. I was feeling so overwhelmed that I froze and didnt do anything. Im trying to quit smoking, yet I havent. I need to get as prepared for Portland as possible, though I havent. I found a full pack of cigarettes at work tonight. I gave half to the bartender, smoked three, and thought " well its good that Im cutting down". On the way home I thought "fuck that" and threw the pack out the window. Going half ass on goals and trying doesnt count. To get shit done I need to follow through with it everytime. I was thinking of that saying that is in all motivation videos/books/tapes etc. Something like, You cant control the world, just yourself. And you cant wait for something good to happen, you have to make it happen. I dont know where I got my procrastination from, but Im old enough to not want it to be a pattern for the rest of my life. Im lucky that my girl is very motivated. That's a tremendous plus. We both are in the same place in our lives, and are going in the same direction. It's good to have someone you love influence you in a good way. It's funny because I never stopped to wonder if the people in my life effect me in a good or bad way. I use to figure that friends were friends and that's all that counts. But the people in your life should bring you up not down, especially if they love you. Anyways, Im tired so off to bed. Im excited for tommorrow, Im gonna need the sleep with how full of a day it'll be. Till then,