janegeraldine

And the novella writing continues...


I had met a new boy at school, one I really, really liked. He was a really close friend of my previous boyfriend and knew a lot about me from talking to him. He told me had been in love me from afar for a long time but had never said anything first because he was too shy and then because I was with his good friend. He knew my darkest secret, that of the miscarriage, and he didn't judge me. We shared everything with each other. I fell in love with him in the boy's locker room between the second and third periods of a hockey game. He was tall and strong and beautiful and kind. He was amazing and he was mine. Three months after we found each other, I was told I was moving to the end of the earth. When I told him, he cried. We talked about all the ways it might be possible for me to stay so we could be together, but in the end, we both knew what was going to happen. Of course there were promises of visiting and staying together even though there was an unfathomable distance between us, but those are just the things you say, I guess, when you can't say anything else and "I love you" just doesn't seem to fill the void left by the loss of something pure and innocent.
The night before I was set to leave, I was with him. We had planned to go to a movie and do all these things together, but in the end, we just drove to a lake and sat in his car. We sat without talking for hours. We looked at each other and it seemed as if one of must say something eventually, but neither of us did. There just wasn't anything left to say. We had said it all. I loved him and I knew he loved me and given the chance we would have run away together, but we just couldn't. I woke up in his arms as the sun was coming up. I knew it was the end and so did he. He drove me home and walked me to the door. We stood outside just holding each other until the world disappeared and there was no one but the two of us standing in a sea of heartbreak. There were tears welling in my eyes as he let go and kissed my forehead. He whispered in my ear that he loved me and would never forget me. I stood and watched as he turned and walked back to his car. The wave goodbye we exchanged as he pulled out of the driveway was the last time I would ever see him.