I'm quite bored on my days off from work. I've got nothing much to do. I don't like the people around town. I hate seeing people I've known for many years. I've shut myself out from making new friends thinking they'll be the same as all the rest. I want to do things with people but when I ask my current friends, they're either too busy or don't wanna do it or are too poor. Or maybe it's just me. Whenever I'm asked to do something though, I almost never say no. Doesn't matter if I want to do it or not. I was supposed to go to a tractor pull with a buddy but on the account of rain it was canceled. He already knew if it was canceled I was gonna go and get me some prime rib. Sadly, the prime rib was sold out. I also asked him to join me for prime rib. I had a feeling he was going to say no. He did say no after a few text messages later.
I'm tired of hearing the word no and almost never saying the word myself. I'm growing too lazy myself to do fun things because doing them myself kinda sucks. I've had thoughts of suicide but I figured there are too many people that would be happy with my death. That and I'm not strong enough to think about it for more then a few seconds. Plus there's too much I wanna do in the near future and in the long future. Lastly, there's so many people I haven't pissed off yet. So no, I won't be attempting that act anytime soon.
So I sit here bored. I have one day each week where I am bored. Well I'm bored before and after work too but I have chores I do to make them work days less boring.
Being able to see the future could be fun or it could be bad. It could be real bad. That's why God doesn't allow us to see the future. There'd be too many suicides. The mind is fragile for most people. I say most because based on what makes people tick are things I just let go. I had an encounter at work not to long ago. Most of my co-workers would of had that dude fired for what he did to me. I just let it go. My super and his super would have had his ass canned if I wanted to pursue it further. But ya know, assholes need jobs too. I've encountered them at every place I've worked at. There's been many places I've worked at.
Talk about being side tracked. Lol I'll finish this blog after these important messages from your local sponsor. Haha.
No, I'm not suicidal so don't feel the need to say things to me about reasons why I should not kill myself. I would like someone to talk about life to though. I'd like to be able to confide in someone and have someone confide in me. Did I say that last sentence right? I'm sure you get the idea I'm trying to get across though.
I can't actually say I want a friend. I can't say I want a girlfriend either. Think about it. ''Hi my name is John Doe and I'm looking for a friend/girlfriend. Will you be my friend/girlfriend?" Like some people would run the other way if they heard that.