jamadge

So yesterday was Brians mother's celebration of life.... which was more of a memorial service in disguise... It was very nice however it sucked. Carol didn't want anything big, no to do or services just to be cremated and her ashes scattered ather favorite spot at the beach... However her sisters still felt the void was not closed and needed the service... So to watch Brian, his sister and father have to go through all the feelings of losing there most prized family member all over again was a bit heart wrenching. We all wore cheerful colors Brian and Bud wore hawaiiian shirts and Me a bright pink diner looking shirt while Leigh was dressed very casual... Everyone else was in black. Where was the celebration? We didn't need to go to the chruch to celebrate Carol... we celebrate her life everytime we sit down as a family together.

This is just another reason why I really don't like organized religion.... Oh and the fact that the preacher plugged the architecture firm Carol worked for in the opening comments... saying how they helped build the church.... Right and I really never wanted a camera phone as much as I did yesterday... the painting of the virgin Mary with the baby christ.... looked like an animation cell straight out of the Cabbage Patch movie....wow I think Weird NJ should be called....

Anyways to blow off some steam because now we both are feeling pretty shitty .... We took our bikes out to Mercer County State Park and spent about an hour and a half tearing through the wooded trails. I love my new bike! It's awesome! I only almost fell a couple times. I did however bruise my right knee and accidentally hit my new tattoo... still sore ouch! But the bike trip was well worth it and was much needed.

I promised his mom before she died that I would take care of her baby and that's exactly what I plan to keep on doing for our lifetime together.

I would do anything for Brian. I love that man as much as I love to breathe.