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ivylina

Russia

SG Since 2015

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Bloghomework: Breaking a habit

Jan 29, 2017
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People who follow me on twitch and get to talk to me there a lot already know that I used to smoke cigarettes when I was younger (probably too young to start smoking in the first place). I was in 10th grade, being 16 and feeling so adult that it was only logical to start smoking which TV shows made look so romantic and posh, how could anyone not give in the temptation?

I had to stop smoking during my exchange year in the US, because 1 - I was too young to, 2 - cigarettes were way more expensive in the US back then than they were in Russia. When I came back home I was determined not to start smoking again, but drunk parties with old smoking friends made me do it again and I was well into the habit by the time my 1st University year had started.

THAT was when I met my boyfriend, who was also an experienced smoker (only he started smoking in States during his Work n Travel experience). That romantic smoke together after sex or spending a ridiculous amount of time on the balcony talking and smoking - man that was a romantic dream I saw in those TV shows come true.

Then one day my BF decided it was enough spending money on something that was not doing any good to you and leaving the worst smell on your hair, clothes, skin, in your mouth and started his journey to break it and quit. He was reading a book (don't remember the name) and was doing it very methodically and gradualy and finally succeded.

During that time we were having a long distance relationship, so we saw each other once a month and it was something very special so we usually got extreme preparations. It was my turn to take a train to him, by that time he had already quit smoking and I was still enjoying my cigarette every now and then. On my way there I realised that my smoking mouth would taste so gross to him now and my smell would be a major turn off. The thought made me smoke my last cigarette on that train in May 2012 and I haven't smoked since.

What I'm trying to say is you have to have an iron will to quit smoking unless you've got a very good reason to. Unless you realize it's going to affect your life and people you love and care about. None of those terrible lungs cancer stories and pictures made me think of quiting, but the idea of my partner being turned off because I smell like a walking cigarette did.

Ok, this one will be embarrasing but I'm attaching a photo of me as a smoker, to prove that all of this did happen to me :) Enjoy. April 2011.

@missy @rambo

VIEW 20 of 20 COMMENTS
d1spl4y:
Belle <3
Feb 7, 2017
ivylina:
@lilymai maybe it's just not your time to quit yet, darling :) 
Feb 7, 2017

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