Not having a very good day/week. I updated my profile picture. I took that today.
DRAMA:
From my last journal today.....
This has been one of the most depressing weeks. Every time I feel like this...It feels like the first time I've felt this bad- the worst time. I know it's not the worst...but it sure does feel like it...I wonder if my depression will ever subside. I feel like my guts are being torn from inside of me. I just want to curl into a ball and die. I feel like I will never feel happy ever again. I can't seem to find hope in anything- even though my rational mind knows that I have the power to change all of this. I feel gross- ugly and sad. I don't want to see anyone or talk to anyone. I have nobody that cares for me. All I do is spent my life figuring out ways to care for other people---i mean for god sakes that is my career goal. ...and i am so broken. My moods change so quickly I can't even catch up with them. I just want some sort of relief.
eh? what can ya do?
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I know this is gonna sound odd but, I think you have awesome eyebrows!
yes it was mind blowing for me that my friends all have babies and are getting married. I had 4 friends give birth since last fall! it was crazy. as cute as they are..thanks I'll wait a few years for mine. it also blows my mind that all my friends babies were "accidents". HOW can that happen w/how easy BC is to get??! I almost slapped them all! geez.
ok. enough of my ranting!