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isthmene

Canada

Member Since 2002

Followers 9 Following 4

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Tuesday Dec 17, 2002

Dec 17, 2002
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Weird day.
I had nightmares all night. My friend Peter trying deperately to tell me something but we kept getting interrupted and there wasn;t time. Like he knew I would wake up soon, or the dream would move on without him. And it did before he could tell me what he needed too. Then i watched a guy get his skull split open on the pavement. In graphic detail. Grey matter, a few shade lighter than the asphalt... Bright blood and pieces of skull, like white piece of an orange peel. I woke up sobbing.

I was late for work and got a little chewed out.

Then I ran into my co=worker coming out of the lunch room in tears. Her daughter is gothy, so we talk alot. She'd just gotten a phone call that her daughter's best friend had hung himself. She was going to pick up her daughter from school.

The day was surreal from then on.
Like the light bulbs have dimmed. All the sparkling Christmans lights are muted. Sound is muffled. I'm freezing cold and can't seem to warm up.

This whole week is a mess. I'm not, for once. And everything has gone to hell in a handbasket. My best guy friend's wife left him. It looks like his best friend has something to do with it. Another one of my friend's GF dumped him by e-mail with no warning. And my best girlfriend told be she started prostituting again. She's broke and behind on her rent.

They all say their fine, ok. But when they look at me their eyes are hollow. Dull. The smiles end at their lips. Their hugs have a sense of desperation. I can smell the suffering on their skin. Feel it slip from their skin right thru mine.

And I worry. All I can do is wait here for them. They'll come when they can. Pour out all the hurt and anguish into my arms. I'll swallow it whole and tell them everything will be alright. Suck the poison from their wounds and lick their scars so they heal. Rock them like infants and hum songs so they can rest.

We'll be ok. In the End.

mistersatan:
Wow. That's some heavy situations for one person to be dealing with in such a little time. IM me sometime if you want to talk.
Dec 17, 2002

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