so i finally got my update on the book im working on. seems that im getting my name on the title page and theyre putting my art on the back of the book as well!! this is just awesome. its amazing exposure for me and a great chance to get real world experience while im still stuck in the world of the ivory tower. now i get to whip up some characters and things will really begin to take off. plus, my friend wants me to do some illustrations for their rpg book too. i hate taking money from friends but he said he'd pay me, so who am i to complain? im starting to dig myself out of that damn financial hole. .. this makes my day
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Monday Jun 20, 2005
its monday.
So yesterday I got off work at 9:45 PM and headed downtown to Cafe Netherworld...As soon as I got in I bolted for the bathroom and tore off my work clothes. I then found myself in a sea of black and grey clothing....it's a good thing I found a job where the dress code includes black formal wear (it also includes white and khaki, but I only go there if I have to)....I was happy to be out there again. For the past couple of weeks it seems that something always came up when I made plans to go out with friends.
I like Cafe Netherworld..have you ever been there? It's a cafe during the day and a bar at night. I was funning how I was ID for my soy chai last night.
From there we went to The Church. I had only been there one time previously for five mins and left because they weren't playing anything good. Apparently, Sunday nights is goth night and it turned out to be pretty good. They had two different rooms with two different DJ's. When one wasn't playing a good song, the other was. Thus I found myself dancing between rooms. Near the end of the night my friend, who had been there before wanted to show me the upstairs (Goth night is in the basement), where there is another club with an entirely different atmosphere. I didn't think twice on the invite up. As soon as I entered the room I was met with blank stares from girls from girls I swear I've only seen in magazines or from walking past a frat party while still in college. As waved in and out of crowds in my long black ballgown, gauze shirt, and trusty eyeliner, I was winked at by a pack of guys in sharp clothes. Normally, I would of found them attractive and normal, but being there at that moment I didn't....I returned downstairs where no one noticed me.
I like to think of myself as a pretty open minded person...so why did I feel so intimidated? It's not as if I only hang out with "Gothy" people. Infact, some of my closest friends are not goth, They are my friends just because they are...I'm usually the only one pushing for the gloom.
I don't think you should ever confine yourself to one category. No sub culture could ever encapsulate your entire identity...The hard part is learning how to balance them all...I'm not as goth as I used to be...because becoming a professional (astronomer) is important to me...but so is being comfortable in my own skin...I'm only saying all this because in the last few months I've realized a lot about myself and how being unhappy in one part of life allows life to keep going at first, but eventually, the other parts start to shut down to. Never let yourself just get by.your way to valuable
Of course Im ALWAYS up for coffee
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