hypermediocrity

i am officially finished doing things that make me unhappy. also finished wasting my damn time.

days like this where i establish goals make me happy. days where i go to work, make a shit ton of money for the amount of hours i worked with little to no effort, and get to eat mediterranean wraps sitting across from the most gorgeous man known to me.

not to say that they arent days where i make no money and put in a lot of effort. there are. i have just had a great week.

ive realised how much pressure social stigmas put on women about weddings too. part of the was seeing that i only wanted a wedding for aesthetic reasons. but fuck it. i'd rather be informal, change my name, and have an exciting fun life... rather than use that money for one day.

looking back when im old i am sure i wont regret that decision. but i am also sure that if i chose to spend the money on a wedding instead of what i am doing, i would regret THAT.

i am not going to have a life with regrets. i am going to do what makes me happy. fuck the rest. why waste my time doing something that doesn't make me feel fullfilled?

wow im philosophical today.

scary, isnt it?